Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell: The New Class, which ran on NBC from 1993 to 2o00.  The show is currently on Prime.

Can the gang convince Megan’s father not to improve her life?

Episode 1.9 “Good-Bye Megan”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on November 6th, 1993)

Megan is frustrated by the fact that, unlike her, the rest of the gang at Bayside has no plans for the future.  She even imagines coming to the 20-year reunion in her medical scrubs (complete with facemask) and discovering that Tommy is a mechanic, Lindsay is a waitress, Vicki is still watching soap operas, Weasel plays video games for a living, and Scott is a lifeguard.

In other words, Megan is a snob.  In her fantasy, it doesn’t matter that it’s been previously established that Tommy is actually a very good auto mechanic and that he could probably make a lot of money fixing other people’s cars.  It doesn’t matter that Lindsay is married to Tommy and appears to be very happy.  It doesn’t matter that Scott also appears to be good at his job (and the world does need lifeguards) and that Weasel is apparently now some sort of video game celebrity.  All that matters is that Megan is a doctor and they’re …. not.

Like, seriously, what type of petty person even has a fantasy like that?  Are all of her friends supposed to become doctors?  The fantasy is inspired by her friends just wanting to enjoy their high school years so, to me, it seems like Megan is just jealous that other people are having a good time while she spends her nights studying.  I certainly wouldn’t want Megan to be my doctor.  She’d probably judge me for caring more about movies than lectures.

Megan’s father (Richard Lawson) is a judge who is able to pull some strings and get Megan accepted to exclusive Willowbrook Academy.  Megan is superexcited about leaving her dumb friends behind but then she meets with two Willowbrook girls and discovers that they are too snobby for her–

Really?  Because I think this episode already established that no one is a bigger snob than Megan.

Megan changes her mind about going to Willowbrook.  She wants to stay at Bayside with her loser friends.  When her father comes to Bayside to give a speech about his life as a judge, Megan’s friends try to convince him that Bayside is a wealthy school, just like Willowbrook.  It’s pretty dumb — for one thing, it’s already been established that the judge knows all of Megan’s friends so why would he suddenly believe that Tommy D was a sophisticated entrepreneur-in-the-making — but it works.  The judge is so moved by the gang’s attempts to lie to him that he allows Megan to stay at Bayside.

Yay, I guess.

This first season is pointless.  There’s no continuity from one episode to the next.  One episode ended with Megan and Scott walking off with each other while the audience went, “Wooooo!”  Another episode has Scott trying to break up Lindsay and Tommy.  Now, suddenly Tommy and Scott are best friends.  Weasel had a crush on Megan but now he doesn’t.  It’s a mess but, on the plus side, most of these people will be gone once season 2 begins.

As for season one, we’ve only got four more episodes to go!