Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Saved By The Bell: The New Class, which ran on NBC from 1993 to 2o00.  The show is currently on Prime.

This week, Scott ruins the school play.

Episode 1.6 “George Washington Kissed Here”

(Dir by Don Barnhart, originally aired on October 16th, 1993)

Mr. Belding is directing the school play, a tribute to the heroes of the American Revolution.  When Scott sees that Lindsay in the play, he decides that he wants her to play Martha Washington while he plays George so that he can kiss her on stage.  Scott goes as far as to convince that Mr. Belding that the play should be an “MTV version” of the American Revolution….

Sorry, I just rolled my eyes so hard that I passed out.  Okay, I’m back.

Anyway, Tommy D gets so jealous that he takes a role as a messenger, despite feeling that acting is “for dweebs.”  Megan is cast as Betsy Ross and Weasel is cast as Ben Franklin.  Vicki is also in the cast because she wants to see Scott in tights.

(Audience: whoooo!)

Tommy D is jealous and tries to ruin the play but Megan calls him out backstage and says, “Tommy D stands for Doesn’t Have A Clue.”  The audience cheers, even though Tommy D’s name should be Tommy DHAC.  Tommy realizes that he’s being a jerk so he apologizes, which leads to Lindsay chasing after him despite the fact that her cue is coming up.  So, Vicki steps in and plays Martha even though Lindsay was previously onstage as Martha.  Vicki kisses Scott, Tommy D and Lindsay get back together, and everyone applauds Mr. Belding, even though the play sucked.

I hated this episode.  As someone who has done high school and community theater, watching these idiots run around backstage ticked me off.  Lindsay missed her cue and everyone acted like it was no big deal.  No, it’s a huge deal.  It was totally unprofessional.  Lindsay should have been expelled.

Watching this episode, it occurred to me that Zack Morris could have pulled it off but Scott’s obsession with Lindsay just comes across as being creepy.  Zack may have been fixated on Kelly and jealous of Slater but at least Kelly was actually single and interested in him.  Lindsay is dating Tommy D and seems pretty happy with him.  Scott needs to move on.  In fact, wasn’t the audience going “whooooo!” about Scott and Megan just two episodes ago?

I hope Mr. Belding never directed another play.