Late Night Retro Television Reviews: CHiPs 1.13 “One Two Many”


Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing CHiPs, which ran on NBC from 1977 to 1983.  The entire show is currently streaming on Freevee!

This week, Baker has a double!

Episode 1.13 “One Two Many”

(Dir by Paul Krasny, originally aired on January 5th, 1978)

This week’s episode of CHiPs opens with a member of the California Highway Patrol pulling over a woman on the highway.  From a distance, he looks a bit like Jon Baker.  However, it soon becomes obvious that he’s not Baker when the fake highway patrolman (played by William Whitaker) says something offensive to the woman in the car.  We don’t hear what he said but the woman announces that she’s never been spoken to so crudely and drives back into traffic.  She also causes a crash as another car swerves to avoid her.  Inside the car, a woman is about to give birth.  Her husband begs for the fake patrolman’s help.  Instead, the suddenly panicked faker drives away.

Fortunately, Baker and Ponch then roll up and they get their day started by helping to deliver a baby.  As usual, it’s Baker who actually knows what to do while Ponch stands around and flashes that blinding grin of his.

Back at headquarters, the woman from the car has filed a complaint against the obscene patrolman.  When she takes a look at the pictures of all of the patrolman who were on duty at the time, she selects Baker.  Knowing that Baker isn’t turned on by anything outside of memories of his life Montana, Sgt. Getraer figures out that there’s a fake cop out there, one who looks just like Jon Baker!

Appropriately enough, Baker and Ponch are the ones who finally arrest him.  Actually, they cross paths with the guy several times, suggesting that God himself means for them to meet.  At one point, Baker and Ponch see a woman named Jobina (Trish Stewart) who is struggling with the fake cop.  They assume that she’s resisting arrest and they grab her.  The fake cop runs off while another real cop — this one from the LAPD — shows up and demands to know what’s going on.  It’s all a bit messy but let’s give credit where credit is due.  William Whitaker is effectively creepy as the fake cop while Trish Stewart gives a strong and emotionally realistic performance as the most prominent of his victims.  After everything she’s been through, she doesn’t want to spend time with any cops, whether they’re real or fake.  The show seems to understand that she has a point.

While this is going on, Ponch is getting on Baker’s last nerve.  Ponch’s RV is being fixed for numerous electronic problems so Ponch moves into Baker’s tastefully decorated apartment.  It turns out that Ponch is not easy to live with, as he really likes to listen to music while he’s sleeping.  As well, Ponch keeps hitting on all of Baker’s neighbors.  In the end, Baker decided to say in Ponch’s damaged RV while Ponch stays in the apartment so let’s just hope the building manager doesn’t find out because next week, both Baker and Ponch might be homeless!

We’ll find out next Monday!

Retro Television Reviews: Miami Vice 1.22 “Lombard”


Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Mondays, I will be reviewing Miami Vice, which ran on NBC from 1984 to 1989.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

The 21st episode of Miami Vice is Evan.  It’s regularly listed as being one of the best episodes of the show and it’s not available to stream online.  Apparently, this is due to someone referring to another character as being a “faggot.”  Yes, it’s a dirty word but I’m an adult and I do think that I could handle hearing the word and figuring out the context of why it was used.  Censorship sucks so shame on Prime, Tubi, NBC, and everyone else who is involved in not streaming Evan.

With Evan not available to be viewed, I moved on to the first season finale.

Episode 1.22 “Lombard”

(Dir by John Nicollela, originally aired on May 10th, 1985)

The first season of Miami Vice comes to an end with a rather simple story.  Lombard (Dennis Farina) is a crime lord, a first-generation Italian-American whose father lived an honest life and who died poor as a result.  Lombard did what he had to do to get ahead and, as a result, he’s now a very rich man who lives on a boat.

He’s also being targeted by both rival gangsters and the law.  When Lombard agrees to testify against the Mafia in return for immunity, Crockett and Tubbs are assigned to babysit him until the trial.  Crockett and Tubbs are both weary of Lombard but Lombard turns out to be a charming guy with a sense of ethics.  He cooks them a big Italian dinner.  He entertain them with stories.  Crockett and Tubbs start to like the guy, even if guarding him means that they get involved in a few mob shootouts.

However, when it comes time to testify, Lombard refuses.  Under the immunity deal, he’s no longer qualified to plead the fifth but Lombard does just that.  Repeatedly, he pleads the fifth and, as a result, he gets enough contempt citations that he’s probably looking at least a decade in jail, regardless of the fact that he didn’t admit to any of the major crimes that he committed.

Sonny and Tubbs are impressed.  Lombard may be a criminal but he has a sense of honor.  He doesn’t snitch.  He’s not a rat.  Of course, that doesn’t make a difference to the criminals who apparently gun him down in the episode’s final ambiguous freeze frame.

The story was simple and, to be honest, it wasn’t anything that Miami Vice hadn’t already done.  But the episode works, because of Dennis Farina’s charismatic performance as Lombard and John Nicolella’s stylish and moody direction.  The first season of Miami Vice ends much as it began, with ambiguity and defeat.  Lombard scores a moral victory but is gunned down minutes afterwards.  Crockett and Tubbs keep Lombard alive just long enough for him to double-cross the authorities.  In the end, the ruthless gangster turns out to have more honor than the people prosecuting him and Crockett and Tubbs are again forced to consider that there’s not a lot of difference between them and the people that they’re chasing.

Next week …. it’s time for Season 2!

Monday Live Tweet Alert: Join Us For Fortune Dane and Skyscraper!


As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in hosting a few weekly live tweets on twitter and occasion ally Mastodon.  I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of Mastodon’s #MondayActionMovie!  Every week, we get together.  We watch a movie.  We snark our way through it.

Tonight, for #MondayActionMovie, the film will be Fortune Dane (1986), starring the great Carl Weathers!

Then, on twitter, #MondayMuggers will be showing 2018’s Skyscraper, starring Dwayne Johnson!  The film is on Prime and it starts at 10 pm et!

It should make for a night of fun viewing and I invite all of you to join in.  If you want to join the live tweets, just hop onto Mastodon, pull up Fortune Dane on YouTube, start the movie at 8 pm et, and use the #MondayActionMovie hashtag!  Then switch over to twitter, pull Skyscraper up on Prime, and use the #MondayMuggers hashtag! 

Enjoy!