Donegan Smith | Through the Shattered Lens

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing 1st and Ten, which aired in syndication from 1984 to 1991. The entire series is streaming on Tubi.

This week, OJ Simpson argues with his wife.

Episode 3.3 “A Loaded Gun”

(Dir by Stan Lathan, originally aired on August 19th, 1987)

With Yinessa continuing to hold out for more money, Teddy thinks that he’s come up with a solution. He tells Yinessa that he will personally take out an insurance policy on him so that Yinessa can work out with the team, despite not having a contract. Yinessa agrees. TD Parker tells all of the defenders not to touch Yinessa because they cannot risk him getting hurt.

“Anyone who touches Yinessa is going to wind up in Buffalo!” Parker tells them.

Unfortunately, John Manzak has been taken too many steroids. As a result, the first thing he does is sack Yinessa. Yinessa is injured. As he’s rushed to the hospital, Diane tells Teddy, “Thank God you got that insurance policy.” Teddy looks worried — uh oh, it looks like someone didn’t get that insurance policy!

At the hospital, a doctor tells Diane that Yinessa has a detached retina and he’ll probably never play football again.

Meanwhile, TD is having trouble in his marriage. He forgets his wife’s birthday but TD’s secretary (Leah Ayres) sends flowers and buys a gift. Unfortunately, TD’s wife sees through the entire ruse. She and TD argue. And because TD Parker is played by OJ Simpson, it’s hard not to worry whenever anyone argues with him.

Hey, that’s a good point, OJ! Let’s move on!

Also, in this episode, Bubba goes to therapy because he hasn’t been able to make love to his wife since she gave birth. Jethro goes with him and pretends to have a shoe fetish. This led to another patient hiding his shoes. 1st and Ten is a comedy that rarely makes me laugh but I have to admit that I did chuckle when Jethro started talking about how much he loved shoes.

Other than the therapy scene, this was a pretty serious episode. Yinessa might never play again. John Manzak is going crazy due to the steroid abuse. (Is he going to be sent to Buffalo? I don’t know how he’s going to handle that!) The kicker is still looking for a wife so he won’t get deported. And Diane has no idea what’s going on with her team.

How will the Bulls ever make it to the championship game!?

I guess I’ll have to keep watching to find out.

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984. The show is once again on Tubi!

This week, a tramp and a wimp seek romantic advice.

Episode 7.20 “Don Juan’s Last Affair/Final Adieu”

(Dir by Philip Leacock, originally aired on April 14th, 1984)

Fashion marketer Whitney Clark (Phyllis Davis) is having an affair with her boss, Daniel Garman (David Hedison). Whitney’s fantasy is to end the affair. Myself, I have to wonder why she would have to come to Fantasy Island to end the affair. Why can’t she just save the money and end the affair in New York or wherever it is that they’re from? Better yet, why can’t she end the affair in New York and then come to Fantasy Island and actually have an enjoyable fantasy?

Daniel is on the Island, putting together a fashion show that he hopes will convince Roarke to commission a line of Fantasy Island fashions. Whitney wants to end the affair but then she meets Daniel’s wife, Elizabeth (Marion Ross). Elizabeth is in a wheelchair and, as she explains it, Daniel only stays with her out of guilt and a sense of responsibility. When she offered Daniel a divorce, he turned it down. Whitney comes to realize that Daniel loves both her and Elizabeth but that Daniel’s heart will always belong to Elizabeth. “If you love me, let me go,” she tells Daniel. She leaves Fantasy Island alone but looking forward to the future. “I’ve come to admire your courage,” Lawrence tells her. I’m not sure what courage he’s referring to. She couldn’t even break up with her married lover without Mr. Roarke’s help.

Meanwhile, nerdy Alan Curtis (Michael Spound) is in love with his best friend, Pat Grayson (Geena Davis, in an early role). Mr. Roarke arranges for Alan to go into the past to Madrid so that the legendary Don Juan (Fernando Rey) can give him advice but, due to a mix-up in the space-time continuum, Don Juan ends up in the present and on Fantasy Land. Pat falls for Don Juan! While Roarke fences with Don Juan, Alan finally tells Pat that he loves her. At first, Pat is like, “But Don Juan….” but then Don Juan mentions that he’s had 14,000 lovers and Pat decides to give Alan a try.

*sigh* The seventh season of Fantasy Island has been really depressing to review. The first few seasons were fun but the seventh season has just been a drag. This episode featured a lively performance from Geena Davis but that was pretty much it. Everyone else seemed bored and unlikable. Whitney and Alan were both wimps.

This was my final trip to the Island for 2025. Retro Television Reviews will be going on break for the Holidays so that I can focus on both the Awards Season and Christmas movies! Fantasy Island will return on January 6th, 2026. There’s only two shows left and then something new will be appearing in this time slot.