Cleaning Out The DVR: Imperfect High (dir by Siobhan Devine)


What do you do when the pills your popping only give you an imperfect high?

Take more!

That’s the philosophy followed by the majority of the characters in Imperfect High, a Lifetime film that serves as a follow-up to Perfect High. In Imperfect High, Nia Sioux of Dance Moms fame plays Hannah, a teenager who wants to be an illustrator. When her mother (Sherri Shepherd) gets a new job in Chicago, Hannah suddenly finds herself going to a new school (the same school from Perfect High) and struggling to fit in with her new classmates. Fortunately, the school has an arts program. Hannah works on her graphic novel and becomes friends with Rob (Anthony Timpano), an artist with a rebellious attitude who compares social media to Chernobyl. (Rob was previously in Perfect High, though he was played by actor Ryan Grantham.) She also meets Dylan (Gabriel Darku), who helps out when Hannah has a panic attack during an active shooter drill.

Rob tries to get Hannah hooked on art but Dylan and his wealthy friends get her hooked on Xanax. Xanax, they assure her, is a great high, it helps out with anxiety, and it’s totally legal. Ever better, if you’re in a hurry, you can smash the pill into a power and just snort it! (They’re not wrong, of course. In college, I once did a line of Xanax in the back booth of the local IHOP. The person I was with kept saying, “I love Zan,” which I found really funny at the time. Of course, snorting drugs at IHOP is not something I would even consider doing today but college was a time for trying new things.) Soon, Hannah has got a prescription of her own and she also has a drug problem! Well, we knew that was coming….

Having now watched both Perfect High and now Imperfect High, I think it might be time to shut down that school because, seriously, nothing good seems to happen there. If you’re artistic or shy, you’re pretty much doomed to end up getting hooked on drugs. And the teachers and the school administrators apparently can’t do anything about it. Perhaps there will be a third film — Rapidly Declining High, perhaps — that will explore whether or not the school itself is cursed. Somewhere, someone is watching these films and saying, “It’s the art program, I tell ya! Ya let these kids get involved with the artistic types and ya know what’s going to happen!”

During its first hour or so, Imperfect High feels a bit overwritten. Everyone is snarky. Everyone has a quip. Rob is perhaps the worst offender. This is one of those films that sometimes seemed to be trying too hard to capture the way that teenagers talk. Things got a little better once Hannah got hooked on pills, if just because the focus went from Hannah and her friends to Hannah and her mother and Nia Sioux and Sherri Shepherd were very believable as mother and daughter. That said, the film approached its subject with a bit of a heavy hand. I think that’s always a mistake when it comes to making movies about drug addiction. I mean, the truth of the matter is that, if you want to guarantee that someone is going to do something, just tell them not to. It’s a bit of a rule that every film about drugs has to end with an overdose but, in the real world, there are negative consequences to drug use that have nothing to do with overdosing. Sometimes, I think anti-drug films would be more effective if they would focus on those negative effects instead of just automatically jumping to a melodramatic overdose.

Obviously, my feelings on Imperfect High were mixed. They were mixed on Perfect High, as well. But Nia Sioux gives a good performance in her starring debut. I always thought she was one of the better dancers on Dance Moms (and certainly, her mother seemed to be the least insane of the moms) so it’s good to see that there’s life after the Abby Lee Dance Company.

What Lisa Watched Last Night #192: His Perfect Obsession (dir by Alexandre Carrière)


Last night, I watched the latest Lifetime premiere, His Perfect Obsession!

Why Was I Watching It?

Because it was on Lifetime, of course!

Plus, I was kinda hoping that it would be like a special Labor Day movie.  Since I’m still not sure what Labor Day is actually supposed to celebrate, I thought maybe His Perfect Obsession would provide some clues.  (Unfortunately, it did not.)

 What Was It About?

Bart (Brendan Murray) is an accountant with a problem.  He’s obsessed with both his client, Allison (Arianne Zucker), and her blind teenage daughter Abigail (Ali Skovbye).  However, Allison doesn’t want to date him and Abigail doesn’t really seem to like him that much either.  Even after Bart murders Allison’s creep of an ex, Allison still doesn’t want to go out with him.  She’d rather go out with a sleazy real estate agent.

What is a crazy sociopath like Bart to do?  He tries drinking at the local bar but the bartender keeps getting in his business.  He tries murdering his mother but that really doesn’t do much for him, either.  Finally, Bart remembers that he does have that remote cabin that hardly anyone knows about…

What Worked?

His Perfect Obsession was filmed in Canada and, visually, it made good use of the snowy landscape.  I especially liked a scene at the start of the film where Bart approached Abigail outside of her house and they had an awkward conversation while the frozen ground glowed in the night behind them.

The performances were all excellent.  Brendan Murray was wonderfully creepy as Bart and Arianne Zucker and Ali Skovbye were both perfectly cast as the mother and daughter.

A lot of us watching online especially liked the character of Ben (Scott Gibson), the world’s most heroic bartender.  If Captain America got a job working in a bar, he’d be a lot like Ben.

Finally, there was a character named Lance Lancaster (Seann Gallagher), who everyone liked because his name was Lance Lancaster.  That’s like one of the greatest names ever!

What Did Not Work?

In general, I’m not a fan of any movie where the final half of the film is taken up with scenes of people being held hostage.  A hostage situation always seems to stall whatever narrative momentum the film has been building up and that’s what happened with His Perfect Obsession.

The scene where Bart murders his mother was so drawn out that the scene itself almost became extremely unpleasant and rather icky to watch.  I know that might sound strange coming from a self-confessed horror fanatic like me but the scene was just way too sadistic for a Lifetime film.  As of late, Lifetime seems to be trying to be a bit more edgy as far as violence is concerned but that’s really not why people watch Lifetime.  Lifetime melodrama should be fun, not traumatic.

“Oh my God!  Just like me!” Moments

I’ve never actually worked with a professional accountant.  My sisters do my taxes for me and, when it comes to money, I find that it’s better to spend it now and hold off on worrying until later.  So, I really couldn’t relate to that part of the movie.

What I did relate to was the relationship between Allison and Abigail, which felt very real and was well-played by both actresses.  It reminded me of the type of relationship that I had with my mom.

Lessons Learned

Use TurboTax.

What Lisa Watched Last Night #165: Secrets of my Stepdaughter (dir by Jem Garrard)


Last night, I watched Secrets of my Stepdaughter on Lifetime!

Why Was I Watching It?

Why Not?  It was on Lifetime and Secrets of my Stepdaughter is a great title.  As our regular readers know, Jeff, Leonard, and I spent all last month watching and reviewing the first two seasons on Twin Peaks.  As soon as I saw the title of this Lifetime film, I immediately thought of that great line from the third episode of series: “She is full of secrets.”

What Was It About?

When teenager Rachel Kent (Tiera Skovbye) survives a robbery that leaves her best friend dead, she becomes a minor media celebrity.  Everyone loves Rachel but the detective (Lucia Walters) in charge of the case has suspicions.  And soon, so does Rachel’s stepmother, Cindy (Josie Davis).  Rachel is just enjoying being a celebrity too much and when Cindy catches Rachel rehearsing the story of the robbery in front of a mirror, Cindy starts to suspect that Rachel may indeed be full of secrets.

What Worked?

The film told an intriguing story.  It opened with a title card telling us that it was “based on a true story” and I’d believe it.  This is actually something that happens fairly regularly.  A victim of a crime will become a minor celebrity, just to then have it revealed that they actually committed the crime themselves.  People love the attention.  What’s interesting is that you never hear much about these people once it’s revealed that they were not victims but instead guilty.  They kind of get pushed to the side and the story gets abandoned because no one wants to admit to having been fooled.

Josie Davis gave a good performance as Cindy.  She’s appeared in several Lifetime films and it was interesting to see her finally play a sympathetic character for once.  The entire film, however, was stolen by Tiera Skovbye, who was a force of cheerfully destructive nature in the role of Rachel.

What Did Not Work?

This was yet another Lifetime film where the family pet is killed off, presumably so we don’t have any doubt that we’re dealing with a total sociopath.  Killing the dog felt so cruelly unnecessary and totally gratuitous that it made it difficult for me to enjoy the rest of the movie.  It seemed to be done for shock value but, at this point, so many pets have been killed in so many Lifetime movies that it’s no longer shocking.

Seriously, leave the pets alone!

“Oh my God!  Just like me!” Moments

“Wow, Lisa, since this movie was about a sociopathic, shoplifting teenage murderer, there were probably a lot of Oh my God!  Just like me! moments!”

Okay, you are no longer my friend.

Actually, to be honest, I did relate to Rachel at the very beginning of the movie.  When she was rehearsing in front of the mirror, I gave her the benefit of the doubt because I do that too.  But then it became obvious that she actually had killed her best friend and the family dog and I was like, “Nope, I have nothing in common with this psycho!”

Lessons Learned

It’s a lot more difficult to fake a crime than you might think.