Freddy’s Nightmares Late Night Retro Television Review: Freddy’s Nightmares 1.3 “Killer Instinct”, Case Wright


GUEST REVIEWER ALERT!!! Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Freddy’s Nightmares, a horror anthology show which ran in syndication from 1988 to 1990. The entire series can be found on Plex!

I am your guest reviewer for the next few “Freddy’s Nightmares”. I have watched three of them and can tell you without a doubt that this show was never really meant to be. At this time, there were two other similar and better shows that were in production or getting greenlit: “The Twilight Zone (reboot)” and “Tales from the Crypt”. This show likely wanted to be “Tales from the Crypt” and I guarantee that the Boomers who wrote “Freddy’s Nightmares” were fans of “Tales”. This story and the other two I watched were likely failed pitches for “Tales” and “Zone”.

The show struggled because network television was not ready for a blood and guts story and certainly not one where Freddy Kreuger, a child murderer pedo, is heavily in the stories. Therefore, he had the role of Crypt Keeper. I’m sure that this was frustrating for Miramax and Wes Craven because Nightmare had amassed nearly 500 Million Dollars. Also, this show was 16 years before Supernatural premiered where audiences craved and demanded gore. The Freddy stories themselves didn’t really lend to horror as much as they were morality play Outer Limits episodes with a story McGuffin to push the clumsy narrative forward.

However, the show could have been saved, IF it were a 30 minute show. In every episode that I watched, the stories ached to roll credits at the 30 minute mark, but the show had an hour slot and the writers tacked on 3 additional act breaks that were always a big oogey mess. Twilight Zone was an hour, but broken into two stories. Tales was 30 minutes and got to do all the gore and nudity it wanted because it was on HBO. Freddy’s overlong padded stories and the FCC restrictions killed what could have been an aggressively mediocre show.

This episode: “Killer Instinct” had a good beginning. Chris Ketchum (Lori Petty) just lost her mother and she wants to honor her by winning track meets even it means losing her soul. BOOM- That is a story- A 30 minute story. At the 30 minute mark, I had seen enough, but I kept going. Chris has heart, but she is losing out to the faster and cuter Nickie (Yvette Nipar) who always beats her in every race and unbeknownst to Chris, Nickie also want to knock boots with Chris’ boyfriend. Chris’ track coach doesn’t help because she is written inconsistently- one moment she’s booting Chris from the team for not trying hard enough and the next she’s giving her evil costume jewelry…. that can kill!!!

Chris gives the evil McGuffin a try and she: runs blurry-fast (which would likely blow out her joints), kills a teacher by choking him with cotton (Yes, that happened), and causes Nickie’s treadmill to go a little faster- it doesn’t hurt Nickie, but Nickie’s workout was slightly more difficult. Wes Craven really needed to give this story another pass. Before Chris can eliminate Nickie (Yvette Nipar) permanently, Nickie strikes first and steals the costume jewelry of doom TCJOD! Nickie uses TCJOD to kill Chris by causing the finish line tape to either decapitate her or break Chris’ neck. It’s unclear how Chris dies, but she does.

The story devolves into a quasi-ghost-zombie-hallucination story. Chris wants revenge and so she sleeps with her boyfriend all gnarly with rotting flesh and she demands that her boyfriend tries to kill Nickie. He doesn’t though- I guess sleeping with a dead person just isn’t what it’s all cracked up to be. Chris starts showing up everywhere in Nickie’s life to drive her insane – including dinner parties and it works really quickly- very quickly. Before the end of the week, Nickie is bludgeoning her boyfriend to death with a…. track trophy, but in her defense she thought it was Chris’ boyfriend! Confused? Yeah, it’s that kind of show. I guess Nickie came in first place in murder!

See you soon!

4 Shots From 4 Films: Is It October Yet?


4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking.

We’re halfway through July, which means that it’s time for me to get ready for October!  (Seriously, who cares about August and September?)  Here to inspire are….

4 Shots From 4 Horror Movies

Night of the Living Dead (1968, dir by George Romero)

The Exorcist (1973, dir by William Friedkin, DP: Owen Roizman)

Carrie (1976, dir by Brian De Palma, DP: Mario Tosi)

Suspiria (1977, dir by Dario Argento, DP: Luciano Tovoli)

 

 

“If Chins Could Kill” and “Hail to the Chin” Quasi-book reviews by Case Wright


Bruce Campbell is the of Elvis of horror and independent film; in fact, he did play Elvis in “Bubba Ho-Tep”. If you’re into independent filmmaking, genre films, and artistic struggles both of these books “If chins could kill” and “Hail to the chin” are must reads and they are also fantastic audiobooks read by the man himself. Sidenote: I never thought his chin was weird- just manly. I enjoyed these books so much that I read them and then I listened to the audiobooks as well, which allowed me to re-experience the books like a favorite Uncle sharing his adventures with me. His entire life is laid bare in his own words: his successes, struggles, and failures. The second book picks up right after the end of the first one. NB: neither book is ghostwritten- a rarity. Sidenote 2: the audiobook really reveals Bruce’s skill at impersonations- he could do a career just doing that.

Bruce sat down and wrote both of these memoirs and if you’re an “Evil Dead” fan he discusses every single aspect of how the “Evil Dead” films were made. He goes into the same detail with every single show and film he has ever done. It’s not just how the sausage was made, it is the equivalent of discussing the history of the pig breed, how the pigs were raised, the tools they used for slaughtering, when they were made into sausage, the spices used, and the marketing to sell the sausage (Both books are available on Audible). The purpose of this article isn’t to grade these books because it’s just weird to grade a Man’s memories as long as the writing is half-way decent; instead of that very weird thing, I will discuss chronologically the moments that I’ve thought about for years in this uniquely American story.

His early years would be the central casting description of a midwestern “Theater Geek”. I never particularly liked that term, but it’s fairly apt because he lived for the dramatic arts, but NEVER complained or thought any job was beneath him- Refreshing. His entire focus in high school was theater and if he had graduated from college, he would’ve been a drama teacher. Luckily for us, Bruce became a college dropout after 6 months and began working on Evil Dead.

Evil Dead

Evil Dead was created by everyone that any connection to Bruce and his comrades, but there were also guilt feelings. Family members helped, parents helped, law firms helped, and probably even the Easter Bunny contributed to making “Evil Dead”. In the filming, everyone on the film was everywhere all the time and lived like they were quasi-homeless in the abandoned house that any horror fan would recognize. It was amazing to me how they had power to run their equipment. The way he describes it has all the intensity of a man remembering in perfect detail that he knew in his soul that this moment would be life-defining. He was right.

One thing that stood out to me was the guilt that Bruce had for asking his father, who was going through a divorce, for funds for the film. As a dad, I can tell that we want our children to be happy and that doesn’t end because you’re getting divorced, sickness, or even death- we always want our children to succeed. Can parental support get out of hand and make us annoyed? Yes, but this was well within the normal limits for a dad. If Bruce reads this article, I hope that he knows that his dad cherishes every dollar he contributed to his son’s dream. Unless of course, you had a dad like mine- in which case, how is it in the fire/police department, EMT, or Armed Forces these days?

Evil Dead 2 and 3

When he described Evil Dead 2 and 3, it was different because he had become a man. He was married and soon to be divorced. He described the work and the filmmaking the way a master carpenter describes his experience and steps making a $10,000 walnut table from a single piece of wood. Neither Bruce’s nor Sam Raimi’s careers had taken off yet and like many of us facing defeat – they went home. Home was of course with the old crew to make Evil Dead 2. Evil Dead over the years on a budget of $375,000 made $30 million….WHOA, but it was clear that Hollywood didn’t understand what they had- this was decades before Blair Witch and Paranormal Activity. It seems that Army of Darkness solidified Bruce as a name. One moment I remember about his memories of Army of Darkness was how he tried to mentor the extras about the importance of never complaining and hustling on the set. They didn’t listen. In fact, two of the extras defiled the set by having coitus in their costumes between takes…..ew. Maybe they were the first furries…. double ew. Or maybe the extras misunderstood the term “Hustling”?

The 90s

The 90s was Bruce Campbell’s decade. Hollywood finally realized with the success of the X-Files and Pulp Fiction that the audience for off kilter actors and stories was not just large- it had money to spend. Bruce found three things: steady work with Hercules and Xena, his soulmate- his second wife Ida Gearon, and his best friend – Lucy Lawless (Xena). He describes his friendship with Lucy like a brother describes the love and pride he has in a sister who made valedictorian. The Bruce/Lucy friendship spans decades and I hope they become neighbors one day. He describes it with such fondness and admiration; it proves that men and women can have platonic and beautiful friendships that last a lifetime. I’m not crying, you’re crying….leave me alone.

2000s through Burn Notice
Bruce had come into his own and was getting cast in A LOT of genre films. He had become a bona fide working actor. I will note that he gets into thorough detail about every single film that he made during this time period. However, I think that many Gen-Z and Millennials discovered him through Burn Notice and if you’re thinking he spills the tea about any on set drama- HE DOES NOT. He talks about how he enjoys dive bars and the different bartender pours. He describes in detail his experience with the show. I enjoyed the second book a lot, but it got personal for me because he convinced his Co-Star Jeffrey Donavan to visit the troops in Iraq. I give them both a lot of credit for that out of all of the great moments in the second book that’s what I think about the most often.

I am a fan of Bruce Campbell’s obviously, but what stood out to me in this uniquely American story is that you really can be anything here if you work at it.

Happy Birthday, Bruce!

4 Shots From 4 Horror Film: Special Herschell Gordon Lewis Edition


4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films is all about letting the visuals do the talking.

Today, on what would have been his birthday, the Shattered Lens remembers director Herschell Gordon Lewis.  It’s time for…..

4 Shots From 4 Herschell Gordon Lewis Films

Blood Feast (1963, dir by Herschell Gordon Lewis, DP: Herschell Gordon Lewis)

Color Me Blood Red (1965, dir by Herschell Gordon Lewis, DP: Herschell Gordon Lewis)

Something Weird (1967, dir by Herschell Gordon Lewis, DP: Andy Romanoff)

The Wizard of Gore (1970, dir by Herschell Gordon Lewis, DP: Alex Ameri and Daniel Krogh)

“Don’t Lie”, Dir. Alex Magana, Short Film Review By Case Wright


So we meet again….Alex … Magana. Now look, I assume that most of my readers are good, kind, and decent, but what if you’re not?! I mean what if you’re not that great or you did one REALLY bad thing that you feel guilty about. I’m not saying putting your neighbor in a woodchipper kind of thing, but let’s just include the lessor felonies. If you just need that self-flagellation, my dear ne’er-do-well compadre, this film and Alex Magana is for you.


Alex Magana assaults the senses and art herself. In fact, from the hackneyed plots to the p*rn quality acting, he is the Ed Wood of the digital age! If you don’t believe me, check out the “Smiling Woman”… SERIES…yes, it’s a series! I refuse to call it a franchise! I won’t do it! Luckily, your misery is brief because as terrible as Alex Magana’s films are – he can’t write stories longer than 4 minutes.

“Don’t Lie” shows an influencer, who I think seems a little old for the gig; however, we must let all things slide with Alex. Typically, Alex just films out of his apartment and the hall in his apartment building. The lead actress could be homeless or just live near the building; so, she could be young, but life on the street is hard. In fact, all of the actors could be homeless and this brief filming was their only exposure to …. home. *Sheds Tear*

The story continues where her boyfriend stages her murder to gain additional subscribers, which doesn’t make sense because why subscribe to the deceased? But, Whatever. A psycho then teaches her and her boyfriend a lesson about … honesty… with a knife. Apparently, neither she nor her boyfriend understand how their legs can make them move around and even away from things or people.

If we look at “Don’t Lie” like an industrial film, like “The Importance of Good Manners”, “Why you should drive safely”, and “Don’t ever put that in your Bu..” anyway. My point is that maybe “Don’t Lie” is salvageable as a lesson film. The lesson is this: Don’t let Alex Magana have any recording devices! EVER! He’s got to be stopped! He’s really prolific! How is paying for all this very very low budget dreck?!

Another Halloween Has Come and Gone


Another Halloween has come and gone and another Horrorthon has come to a close.  We hope you have had a wonderful October and that the Thanksgiving month brings you much to be grateful for!

And remember, just because you didn’t see the Great Pumpkin this year, doesn’t mean that he won’t be there for you next October.  As always, Linus puts it best:

To all of our readers and from all of your friends at the Shattered Lens, thank you.

Bonus Horror Scene Of The Day: The End Of 10 To Midnight


The scene below is a major spoiler for the film 10 to Midnight so don’t watch if you haven’t seen the film yet.  And, to be honest, you probably shouldn’t even read the rest of this post, as the post itself is probably a spoiler as well.  There’s no way to truly talk about this film without talking about the ending.  10 to Midnight is a film that’s been on my mind a lot this year, largely because Charles Bronson plays a character who reminds me of my Dad.  Bronson’s relationship with his daughter (played by Lisa Eilbacher) also reminds me of my own relationship with my Dad.  I doubt there’s many people who get sentimental over a relatively unheralded vigilante horror film from 1983 but, as I’m still processing losing my Dad earlier this year, I am one of those people.

If you have seen the film, you know that this is one of the best endings that Charles Bronson ever filmed.  Indeed, in today’s chaotic world, there’s some very satisfying about both Bronson’s final line and his no-nonsense style of dealing with problems.  And indeed, with all the bad vibes that seem to have been unleashed on the world over the past few years, this scene feels like an exorcism of sorts.

Serial killer Warren Stacy (Gene Davis) thought he could game the system.  He thought he had everything figured out.  He smugly assumed no one could stop his reign of terror.

Well, Bronson disagrees.

And with that one wonderful final line, Charles Bronson brings this year’s Horrorthon to a close.

Bonus Horror on TV: The Curse of Degrassi (dir by Stefan Brogren)


This is a special episode of my favorite TV show of all, Degrassi!  Originally airing on October 28th, 2008, The Curse of Degrassi features Degrassi’s main mean girl, Holy J Sinclair (Charlotte Arnold), getting possessed by the vengeful spirit of deceased school shooter, Rick Murray (Ephraim Ellis).  Chaos follows!  Fortunately, Spinner (Shane Kippel) is around to save the day.  As any true Degrassi fan can tell you, only Spinner has a chance against the forces of the undead.

What I like about this episode is that, in the best tradition of Degrassi, it goes there.  Holly J does get possessed.  Just about the entire cast end up dying horribly.  Spinner has to battle the undead spirit of Rick Murray and he has to do it without the help of Drake.  And, as far as we know, this episode is canon.  So, yes, Rick Murray’s ghost actually does haunt Degrassi Community School and yes, only Spinner can save us all.

Go Spinner!

Enjoy!

Horror On TV: One Step Beyond 3.36 “Eyewitness” (dir by John Newland)


For this year’s horrorthon’s final episode of One Step Beyond, we have the …. final episode of One Step Beyond!

In this, the series’s very last episode, a Boston newspaper reporter in 1883 somehow manages to write a firsthand account of one of the greatest natural disasters in human history, the volcanic eruption of Krakatoa.  Making his accomplishment all the more amazing is that he not only filed the story the day before it happened but he also says that he has no memory of writing it!  What’s going on?  Take one step beyond and find out!

This episode originally aired on July 4th, 1961.

Here’s The Trailer For Presence


Here’s the trailer for Presence, another horror film that could have taken advantage of the scary season but which is instead being released later next year.  Add to that, this is a Steven Soderbergh film.  When Soderbergh’s good, he’s great.  When he’s bad, he’s painfully self-indulgent.

Lucy Liu is cool, though.