Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Welcome Back Kotter, which ran on ABC  from 1975 to 1979.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, the third season comes to an end.

Episode 3.27 “Class Encounters of the Carvelli Kind”

(Dir by Robert Hegyes, originally aired on May 18th, 1978)

At the Kotter apartment, Gabe tells Julie a joke about his Uncle Bruce, the dressmaker.  Julie responds by slamming the bedroom door in his face.  Poor Gabe!  Julie, if you hate his jokes that much, just get a divorce!

The next morning, Gabe steps into his classroom and finds Mr. Woodman sitting at the window and watching the rain falling outside.  “Being alive is overrated,” Woodman says.  “Try telling that to a dead person,” Gabe replies.  Woodman reveals that, when he was young, he dreamed of being a podiatrist.  “I love feet but I hate socks …. Sock stood between me and happiness!”

Woodman has every reason to be depressed.  There’s some sort of weird student exchange program going on.  Epstein is spending the week at another high school.  (In real life, Robert Hegyes was not available to play Epstein because he was busy directing this episode.)  Meanwhile, Carvelli (Charles Fleischer) and his buddy Murray (Bob Harcum) are going to Buchanan.

When Carvelli and Murray tell a story about being abducted by aliens and taken to the planet Yorksl, Gabe takes them to the vice principal’s office so Woodman can straighten them out.  To Gabe’s surprise, Woodman not only believe Carvelli’s story but he decides that he wants to go live on another planet.  He gives Carvelli permission to invite the aliens to land in the school’s courtyard.  Gabe is even more shocked with the alien does show up and it turns out to be Julie!  Julie explains that she’s a Yorsklite and then she agrees to Woodman away with her.  “You look like a nice little fella….”

Wow, I guess the show’s over.  I mean, Woodman is gone.  Julie’s an alien.  How do you do another episode about homework after that….

Oh wait, it was all a daydream.

Okay, never mind!

Usually, I hate it when a show does the whole “It was all a dream” thing but I actually enjoyed this episode because it gave John Sylvester White a chance to be totally unhinged as Woodman.  White’s performance as Woodman has been one of the few things to remain consistently strong through the first three seasons of Welcome Back, Kotter.  Watching him lose his mind, piece-by-piece, has truly been entertaining.

The episode and the third season ends with Washington tells Mr. Kott-air a joke about how ugly his aunt is.  Gabe is impressed enough to write the joke down on a notepad.

And that’s it for Season 3!  This was definitely an uneven season, with the humor ultimately getting a bit too broad for its own good.  The Sweathogs themselves are all obviously adults now.  This was something that Gabe Kaplan himself noticed.  He reportedly suggested setting the next season at a community college and having Gabe get a job as a professor.  (His students would, of course, be the graduated Sweathogs.)  ABC disagreed, which resulted in Gabe not appearing in several season 4 episodes.  Meanwhile, John Travolta also only appeared in a handful of episodes as he was now busy being a movie star.

What would all that mean for Season 4?

We’ll start finding out next week!