Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing Gun, an anthology series that ran on ABC for six week in 1997.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

This week, Robert Altman!  This will be good …. right?

Episode 1.4 “All The President’s Women”

(Dir by Robert Altman, originally aired on May 10th, 1997)

When it comes to the fourth episode of Gun, I have to admit that my expectation were high because this episode was the only one in the series to be directed by Gun’s producer, Robert Altman.  The story, about the womanizing president of a golf club, sound like it would be right up Altman’s alley and allow him to engage in the social satire for which he was best-known.

Unfortunately, the episode itself just isn’t that good.  In fact, it’s the worst episode of Gun that I’ve seen so far.  Watching the show, it’s easy to see that Altman directed it.  There’s several very Altman-like moments.  The show’s plot and its characters all tend to mirror Altman’s trademark obsessions.  That said, for all of Altman’s strengths as a filmmaker and a satirist, he was also a bit self-indulgent and this episode is basically 50 minutes of Altman patting himself on the back and bragging about how clever he is.

The film takes place at a golf club in Texas.  After the club’s president is bitten by a rattlesnake and then accidentally shoots himself in the foot while trying to kill the snake, Bill Johnson (Randy Quaid) is elected as his replacement.  Bill is friendly but shallow, a businessman who is all about prestige and showing off his wealth.  While his wife (Daryl Hannah) spends her time researching real-life presidents, Bill is having an affair with the former’s president’s widow (Jennifer Tilly) while also flirting with his new secretary (Dina Spybey).  Meanwhile, another former lover (Sean Young) is now his attorney while Sally Kellerman plays Jennifer Tilly’s mother and continually warns Bill to stay away from her daughter.

Bill is shocked to discover that someone is sending packages to the women in his life.  Jennifer Tilly receives the gun that was used to shoot the rattlesnake.  Darryl Hannah receives the magazine.  Sean Young receives the bullets.  If you can’t already guess that this is going to end up with Bill in his underwear on the 18th hole, being menaced by a woman carrying a gun, I don’t know what to tell you.

This episode just falls flat and it’s largely the fault of the cast.  Randy Quaid, at the very least, has a Texas accent but he’s not a convincing lothario.  The women all butcher their accents, with the majority of them sounding more like they’re from Georgia than Texas.  Most the cast goes overboard with their quirkiness while Altman directs in a meandering fashion that robs the episode of whatever satirical impact that it might have had.  It’s just a boring episode, regardless on the nails-on-a-chalkboard accents and all the overacting.  Watching this episode, I was reminded of why I usually can’t stand anthology shows.  They just seem to bring out the worst in everyone.

Next week, Kirsten Dunst guest stars.  Did Gun bring out the worst in her?  We’ll find out!