Michael Caruana | Through the Shattered Lens

Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Fridays, I will be reviewing Friday the 13th: The Series, a show which ran in syndication from 1987 to 1990. The entire series can be found on YouTube!

Another Friday, another cursed antique….

Episode 3.10 “Mightier Than The Sword”

(Dir by Armand Mastroianni, originally aired on January 8th, 1990)

Micki’s been possessed again!

This time, it’s the result of a writer named Alex Dent (Colm Feore, who appeared in quite a few episodes of this show, always as a different villain) using his cursed pen to write about Micki becoming a serial killer. That’s how Alex makes his money. He writes about people becoming serial killers and then, when they do exactly what he has written, Alex publishes a true crime book about them.

Johnny is a huge fan of Alex’s books. Micki says that she’s seen enough death in real life without having to read about it. Johnny doesn’t seem to take her seriously, which is odd. Sometimes, Johnny seems to forget that he and Micki spend all of their time dealing with cursed antiques and battling the Devil. I mean, has Johnny forgotten about the time that he spent in prison after he was wrongly convicted of murdering his father? Johnny seems to go from being streetwise to naive rather abruptly, all depending on what the episode’s story requires of him. It’s also a bit of an odd coincidence that Johnny would just happen to be a fan of someone who has one of the cursed antiques but, then again, this wasn’t the first time this happened on Friday the 13th and I imagine it will happen a few more times as well.

This episode had an interesting premise, though I do have to wonder how Alex found out about the curse in the first place. It doesn’t seem like the most practical of curses. Alex must write, sell, and publish his books in record time. Micki always seems to be getting possessed, which usually leads to her posing in a doorway and delivering her lines like a 40s noir heroine. (In this episode, she also takes up smoking.) Fortunately, Robey always did a good job pulling off the whole suddenly possessed thing. I imagine it must have been pretty traumatic for Micki but at least Johnny learned a lesson about reading trashy true crime paperbacks.

As for this episode, Colm Feore was a good villain, there was plenty of noirish atmosphere, and the episode didn’t take itself particularly seriously. It kept me entertained! Really, what more can you ask from a show?

This week, a hearing aide turns into a snake and heads explode all over wherever this show is supposed to be taking place. I always assumed this show took place in Canada but some people insist it was set in Chicago. I just know it’s taking place somewhere cold.

Episode 3.5 “Stick In Your Ear”

(Dir by Douglas Jackson, originally aired on October 16th, 1989)

Hack stage mentalist Adam Cole (Wayne Best) has come into possession of a cursed hearing aid that allows him to hear the thoughts of other people. This is great for act! However, the hearing aid also sometimes becomes so full of other people’s thoughts that Adam has to commit murder to keep his head from exploding. Yikes!

This is yet another episode where more time is spent with the person using the cursed object than with Jack, Micki, and ~~Ryan~~ Johnny. There’s not necessarily anything wrong with that and Wayne Best does fine in the role of the not-particularly sympathetic Adam Cole. But, watching this episode, I still found myself missing the old days — let’s call them the Ryan days — when the chemistry between the three leads was often just as important as the gore and the horror. As a character, Johnny still often feels a bit half-baked, as if the show’s writers still weren’t quite sure who he was. When he was first introduced, he was cocky and streetwise. Then he went to prison for a murder he didn’t commit! Then, he was revealed to be a baseball fan who liked to build ships in bottles. And now, in this episode, he’s suddenly an aspiring writer who enjoys reading the tabloids. Steven Monarque does what he can but the character is so inconsistent that Johnny still feels a bit out-of-place in the show’s world. At the very least, Ryan had a reason for sticking with the often grisly hunt for the antiques. He wanted to do it with his cousin. (I know, I know …. ewwww! But it was also Ryan’s most defining motivation.) Johnny’s motivations are a bit more opaque.

This episode did feature some Cronenbergian body horror, a nice reminder of Friday the 13th‘s Canadian origins. Not clearing out the hearing aid leads to some exploding head action which is quite graphic even for this show. That said, it bothers me that one person’s head more or less implodes in front of an entire studio audience and you really do have to wonder how exactly that’s going to be explained to the press. I would think an exploding head and a snake-like hearing aid would lead to a lot of people saying, “Hey, maybe there is something out there.”

This was a gory episode, nicely acted and featuring an intriguing antique. That said, I still miss Ryan.