Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Malibu CA, which aired in Syndication in 1998 and 1999.  The entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!

Why do I do this to myself?

Episode 1.17 “The Game Show”

(Dir by Gary Shimokawa, originally aired on February 14th, 1999)

Scott has been promoted!  His father has made Scott the new weekend manager of his restaurant, The Lighthouse.  Jason is offended, even though Jason regularly comes to work late and is rude to the customers.  Strangely enough, though, the other workers at The Lighthouse, the majority of whom have probably been working there longer than both Jason and Scott, are not offended that a major promotion was given to the boss’s inexperienced jerk of a son.  Seriously, Scott has only been in Malibu for a few months and he’s gotten in just as much trouble with Jason.  Neither one of them deserves a promotion.

Jason and Scott are selected to appear on Blind Date, a dating game show that airs on Malibu’s public access channel.  (Not surprisingly, the show is hosted by Tracy.)  Jason makes a $300 bet with Scott that he can win the date.  Jason’s plan is to cheat by sneaking a look at the audition tape of the girl who will be selecting her date.  Scott discovers that Jason is cheating so he cheats by convincing Tracy to invite a different girl on the show.  During the show, Jason realizes what Scott has done and calls him out.  Tracy disqualifies both of them, which means that Murray wins the date.

I got a headache just writing that paragraph.

Meanwhile, Stads puts on a fat suit so that she can research how people treat the obese.  A lifeguard named Darren (Brody Hutzler) asks Stads out while she’s in disguise.  Stads is excited to finally have a date but will Darren still want to date her when he finds out that Stads is thin?

Every Peter Engel-produced sitcom did at least one episode where one of the main characters found themselves being forced to either go on a date or work with a fat person.  Usually, these episodes ended with the standard message of “It’s what’s inside that counts,” and then the fat character, having served their purpose, would never be seen or mentioned again.  The theme of this episode of Malibu, CA seems to be that some people don’t care about physical appearances and seriously, what the Hell’s wrong with those people?  Stads learns that not everyone is turned off by a few extra pounds and wow, those people are weird!  It’s not a great message for a sitcom aimed at teen girls, to be honest.

As usual, this episode struggles because almost everyone on the show comes across as being a sociopath.  Scott is promoted for no good reason and immediately gets an attitude.  Jason breaks the fourth wall to brag to the audience about how he’s going to lie, cheat, and steal.  Stads may not be a sociopath but she is remarkably shallow in this episode.  It’s always strange the way that this show insists that Stads, who is blonde, pretty, and athletic, can somehow never get a date.  Maybe it would help if she had a better name.  Stads probably sounds a bit too much like Stabs.

Murray and Tracy are, at this point, is the only decent characters on the show, largely because they’re both open and honest about who they are and they’re not ashamed of their quirks.  Brandon Brooks and Priscilla Inga Taylor both seemed to have understood that it was pointless to try to give “real” performances on this show and their willingness to full embrace the over-the-top silliness of their characters went a long way towards making them tolerable.

Next week, the agony continues!