Georganne LaPiere | Through the Shattered Lens

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing Welcome Back Kotter, which ran on ABC from 1975 to 1979. The entire show can be purchased on Prime.

This week, we finally finish this show up.

Episode 4.23 “The Bread Winners”

(Dir by Norman Abbott, originally aired on June 8th, 1979)

Epstein is excited about getting a job working at an antique store. However, a chance meeting with the store’s owner leads to Freddie getting the job instead. Epstein gets upset and, after a tense confrontation at the Horshack residence, Epstein challenges Washington to a boxing match at the local gym. However, once at the gym, Epstein and Washington realize that they’re friends. They care about each other. They’re not going to let a little thing like a job come between them. The owner of the gym is so moved that he gives Epstein a job.

And so ends Welcome Back, Kotter. After 95 episodes, Kotter ends not with a bang but with a definite whimper. We don’t even see the Sweathogs defy the odds by finally graduating. It’s an underwhelming finale but apparently, it was made when there was still the possibility of a Kotter spin-off, which would have focused on Horshack and his marriage to Mary. This episode also sets up the possibility of a show featuring Washington working at the antique store or even Epstein working at the gym. (Henry Beckman plays the owner of the gym while Priscilla Morrill plays the owner of the antique store and both of them get a lot more dialogue and character-building moments than the guest stars typically got on Kotter.)

On the plus side, the show did manage to get nearly the entire cast to show up for the finale. Barbarino is absent, of course. But Gabe Kaplan makes one of his rare appearances, giving Washington some advice on how to make up with Epstein. Julie shows up at the beginning of the show but, noticeably, Marcia Strassman doesn’t share any scenes with Kaplan. John Sylvester White, as Woodman, gets to do his crazed laugh one last time. Beau gets a few lines of dialogue. We get a peek at Horshack’s homelife with Mary and even Epstein’s girlfriend, Kelly, shows up for a few scenes.

Again, this was an underwhelming finale but that makes sense when one considers that season 4 was an underwhelming season. Looking over this show, the first two seasons were the best. During those seasons, the show had a bit of an edge and the actors really seemed to be trying to ground their outlandish characters in at least a hint of reality. The third season saw the show turn into a living cartoon and Kotter never really recovered. By the fourth season, the actors cast as the Sweathogs were too old to still be playing high school students, Kaplan was refusing to appear on the show that was based on his stand-up act, and way too much time was wasted on Julie getting upset and glaring at people.

Well, we’re done with Welcome Back, Kotter. Next week, a new show will premiere in this time slot. It’s been a while since I started a new show so I’m looking forward to finding one that will be a slight change of pace. What will the show be? Check here next Saturday to find out!

This week, Epstein gets a story of his very own.

Episode 4.16 “The Goodbye Guy”

(Dir by Norman Abbott, originally aired on February 1oth, 1979)

Barbarino is gone. Gabe is gone. It’s Epstein’s turn to step up and become the center of the show.

Epstein is upset because he has wrestling tickets but the other Sweathogs all have dates for the evening, For some reason, Epstein decides to go the Kotter apartment even though Gabe is — *ahem* — out of town. Was Epstein planning on asking Julie to go see a wrestling match with him? We’ll never know because Julie is not at the apartment. She’s at the faculty dance with Mr. Woodman.

Mr. Woodman’s niece, Kelly (Georganne LaPiere), is at the apartment, babysitting the rarely-seen Kotter twins. (I was actually starting to think that Gabe might have abducted the twins and moved to Long Island with them, it’s been so long since we’ve seen or heard from any of them.) Kelly is a college student but she looks considerably younger than Epstein, who is supposedly just a high school senior. That said, it’s love at first sight between Kelly and Epstein. Mr. Woodman’s not happy about that and orders Kelly to stay away from the Sweathog. So, of course, Kelly moves in with Epstein.

It’s as culture clash, of course. Kelly is smart and sophisticated. Epstein has been in high school for ten years and says that his dream is to own a fleet of dump trucks. After Kelly laughs at his dream and Epstein makes a scene at a vegetarian restaurant, it looks like their love might be doomed!

Well, that happens when you move in with someone after knowing them for two hours….

“I’m going to miss you, Fido,” Epstein says after they have one final conversation in the high school courtyard. The audience says “Awwwww!” but I think Kelly made the right decision to walk way because Epstein is never going to graduate high school. The show’s producers obviously intended to keep the Sweathogs in that school forever. Add to that, how can you love a guy who nicknames you after a dog?

Speaking of nicknames, why does Epstein tolerate being called “Little Juan” by Horshack? When this show began, Epstein was the most dangerous and unstable of the Sweathogs. He was the one who was voted most likely to take a life. I remember at least a few episodes where he brought a knife to school. Epstein was always on the verge of exploding, which made his character an interesting one. If Kotter could reach Epstein, he could reach anyone. But now, Epstein is just as bland and well-behaved as everyone else in the show. It’s a shame.

Oh well. At least Woodman was happy by the end of this episode.

We’re nearly done with this show! Only a few more episodes to go. Will Gabe ever return? We’ll find out.