Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 7.2 “The Big Switch/Hooker’s Holiday”

Posted on July 22, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Tuesdays, I will be reviewing the original Fantasy Island, which ran on ABC from 1977 to 1984. Unfortunately, the show has been removed from most streaming sites. Fortunately, I’ve got nearly every episode on my DVR.

This week, the tyranny of Laurence continues.

Episode 7.2 “The Big Switch/Hooker’s Holiday”

(Dir by Bob Sweeney, originally aired on October 15th, 1983)

Shelley James (Melinda Culea) is a high-priced call girl who comes to Fantasy Island looking for an escape from her life. For one weekend, she wants not only a normal life but also a chance to meet a man who will love her without paying her for sex. Luckily, Brad Jacobs (Richard Hatch) is also on the Island!

This is the type of fantasy that Fantasy Island handled well in the past. It doesn’t work out quite as well this episode became Mr. Roarke’s new servant (there’s no other word for him), Laurence, makes some rather snarky and judgmental comments about Shelly and her profession (asking at one point whether she’s on the Island for a fantasy or to give someone a fantasy) and it just feels totally wrong. One of the good things about Fantasy Island was that Roarke never judged the people asking for fantasies. He may have warned them about what they would discover. Sometimes, he manipulated them to help them discover something important about themselves. But once you were allowed to come to the Island, Roarke didn’t judge you and neither did Tattoo. In fact, Tattoo was probably even less judgmental than Roarke. Tattoo knew what it was like to be judged. Laurence, on the other hand, is a snooty British butler and seems personally offended by Shelley’s presence on the Island. (Eventually, after she shares her tragic backstory, he comes around but still, it shouldn’t take a sad story to get people to treat each other with decency.) Laurence is the type of employee who would keep me from wanting to visit the Island. I fear he would tell me that my skirt was too short or something.

As for the other fantasy, Laura Walter (Katharine Helmond) feels that her husband George Walter (Vic Tayback) is a chauvinist and she’s right. She wants him to experience what it’s like to be a woman so Roarke arranges for them to switch bodies. Laura is in George’s body and George is in Laura’s body but for some reason, the show dubs their voices so, whenever George speaks, we hear Laura’s voice and whenever Laura speaks, we hear George’s voice. It’s a bit awkward. Why would their voice switch too? Anyway, Laura discovers that women tend to toss themselves at George and George discovers that his business partner is a lech.

It’s the final season and final seasons often feel uninspired. That was certainly the case with this episode. Even the reliable Ricardo Montalban seemed bored with it all. In the end, it’s just not as much fun without Herve Villechaize around.

Retro Television Review: Fantasy Island 7.1 “Forbidden Love/The Other Man — Mr. Roarke”

Posted on July 15, 2025 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Today, we start the seventh and final season.

Episode 7.1 “Forbidden Love/The Other Man — Mr. Roarke”

(Dir by Don Weis, originally aired on October 8th, 1983)

The first episode of the seventh season finds Mr. Roarke handling two fantasies.

Widow Margaret Smith (Juliet Prowse) comes to Fantasy Island, hoping to meet the man of her dreams. However, when she does, it turns out that he’s the ex-boyfriend of her daughter, Ginny (Jamie Rose)! Can Margaret find love without hurting her daughter? Or is her love destined to remain forbdden….

Meanwhile, Deborah Barnes (Stephanie Faracy) wants to make her boyfriend jealous so Mr. Roarke arranges for her to meet a man on the Island. But when the man is suddenly unavailable, Mr. Roarke gallantly steps into his place. That’s nice of him. It shows how far Mr. Roarke will go to make the fantasies of his guests come true. Except — uh-oh! — now Deborah’s in love with Mr. Roarke! What can Mr. Roarke do to let Deborah down easily and repair her confidence?

Wow! That’s a lot of drama for one weekend! I wonder what Tattoo has to say…?

Tattoo? Are you there?

OH MY GOD, WHERE IS TATTOO!?

Tattoo is gone, replaced by a butler named Lawrence (Christopher Hewett) who is so heavy-set that he can’t even climb the stairs to ring the bell when the plane shows up over the island. Instead, he looks up at the sky and then pushes a remote button that makes the bell ring. That’s …. just lame. Over the past few years, I have resisted making “Da plane! Da plane!” jokes but seriously, it doesn’t feel right for the show not to start to those words.

What’s especially upsetting is that no one on the show mentions Tattoo. Roarke doesn’t mention why Tattoo is no longer on the Island. Instead, he acts as if Lawrence has always been his assistant. I mean, I understand that Herve Villechaize did not leave under the happiest of circumstances but it just feels cruel not to give Tattoo a proper send-off. Tattoo was a huge part of the show. His interactions with Mr. Roarke were the most consistently entertaining things about Fantasy Island. And now, he’s gone and the show refuses to even acknowledge that he was ever there.

As for Lawrence, he’s a butler. I don’t know how the season played out but, in the first episode, it was pretty clear that Lawrence was the hired help. (Tattoo, at the very least, always seemed to be on nearly equal footing as Roarke.) Lawrence calls Mr. Roarke “sir” and it just doesn’t feel right. Instead of being equals, they are very much employer and employee.

The fantasies are okay. I liked watching Roarke trying to make Deborah fall out of love with. But the addition of Lawrence felt so wrong and really distracting. It doesn’t bode well for the rest of season 7.

Retro Television Reviews: California Dreams 3.2 “Follow Your Dreams” and 3.3 “Budget Cuts”

Posted on December 24, 2022 by Lisa Marie Bowman

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Saturdays, I will be reviewing California Dreams, which ran on NBC from 1992 to 1996. The entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!

This week is all about aptitude tests and radio stations!

Episode 3.2 “Follow Your Dreams”

(Dir by Patrick Maloney, originally aired on September 17th, 1994)

The school guidance counselor (Christopher Hewett) gives everyone an aptitude test. Mark discovers that he should be a guidance counselor. Tiffani discovers she should be a vet. Tony discovers that he should be a musician. (Way to go, Tony!) Lorena’s ideal career choice is fashion designer. The same is true of Sly, largely because he copied off of Lorena’s test. Jake, meanwhile, is told he should go into arranging flowers.

This comes at a bad time for Jake. He’s been suffering from writer’s block and, when the test says that he has no artistic skills, he considers giving up music. Fortunately, he changes his mind. The Dreams already lost Matt, I doubt they could survive losing Jake.

Meanwhile, Sly briefly becomes Lorena’s boyfriend but that only lasts a day before she discovers that he copied her test. She humiliates Sly by forcing him to dress up like a caveman for a school presentation. (Sly actually looks good as a caveman so it doesn’t quite work.) Fear not. Sly and Lorena will eventually get a second chance in another season or two.

This was a good episode. Tony turning into a pretentious beatboxer was especially amusing.

Episode 3.3 “Budget Cuts”

(Dir by Patrick Maloney, originally aired on September 24th, 1994)

What was the deal with Peter Engel-produced shows and school radio stations?

Saved By The Bell had a school radio station that was used to help save the Max. City Guys had a radio station that became a major part of the show after Chris and Jamal abandoned work on the video yearbook. Did Hang Time have a school radio station? It honestly would not shock me if they did.

Anyway, California Dreams also has a school radio station and Sly has been named the general manager. Of course, all of the Dreams get programs of their own. Mark becomes a drama critic and upsets Tony by ridiculing his performance as Hamlet. Sam gets a job running an advice show and tells people to go see Mrs. Doubtfire. Jake gets a show called “Shut Up and Listen!” And Lorena does a show about fashion. (“Combats boots are hot but wearing them with tube socks is not.”)

The radio station is a huge success for everyone but Jake. As Sly points out, people don’t want to be told to shut up and listen. When Jake refuses to change his format, Sly fires him. The audience gasps. One scene later, Principal Blumford (played by character actor Earl Boen), enters the radio station and announces that the school board has decided to cut funding for the radio station!

I’m sure you can guess what happens next. Lorena, Tiffani, and Sam want to start a petition to save the station. Jake ridicules them for not being “real rebels” so Lorena proves him wrong by locking herself in the radio station and broadcasting without authorization. Jake is so impressed that he not only makes out with Lorena (on the air) but he also attends a school board meeting and successfully argues that the station is important. Jake wears a suit to the meeting. The audience goes crazy. The episode ends with him and Lorena declaring their love for each other while everyone else celebrates the fact that the radio station has been saved.

This is actually my second time to review this episode. The first time I reviewed it, I think I was a little bit dismissive but I better appreciated it this time. Some of that’s because I’ve been watching One World, a show in which the cast had absolutely no chemistry. After watching something like One World or some of the lesser episodes of City Guys, it’s easier to see just how well the cast of California Dreams played off of each other. They’re believable as friends and bandmates and that definitely adds something to the show, regardless of how broad some of the humor may be.

The highlight of this episode? Lorena calling Jake “fake Fonzi.” What made it work was that Jake responded by saying, “Heeeey.” A close second would be Principal Blumford announcing, “I’ll be back,” which was a nice shoutout to Earl Boen’s role in The Terminator franchise.

Next week …. more music!