What Lisa Marie and the Snarkalecs Watched Last Night #71: End of the World (dir by Steven R. Monroe)


Last night, the Snarkalecs and I watched the SyFy original movie, End of the World.  For the next two hours, we literally dominated twitter as we shared our mutual, nearly obsessive love for this film.  Soon, #EndOfTheWorld was a trending topic and, I’m happy to say, that ended up freaking out a lot of paranoid people who weren’t watching SyFy.

All in all, it was a pretty good night.

End of the WorldWhy Were We Watching It?

Because that’s what the Snarkalecs do.  We watch movies on SyFy and we usually get all snarky about them.  However, it was difficult to be snarky about End of the World because the people who made End of The World were obviously very snarky themselves.

What Was It About?

The world’s being bombarded by chunks of electromagnetic space debris.  Or something like that.  Really, the important thing to know is that the world’s about to end and it’s up to two video store clerks (played by two titans of nerdy adorability, Greg Grunberg and Neil Grayston) to save it.  Their solution involves breaking a sci-fi writer named Doc Brown (Brad Dourif) out of a mental asylum and Greg Grunberg working on a nuclear missile with a power drill.

However, to be honest, the plot is just a distraction.  The storyline is mostly used as an excuse to make clever references to nearly ever science fiction movie ever made.  Some of the references are obvious and some of them are a bit more subtle but, ultimately, they are what this movie is truly about.

What Worked?

It all worked.

Seriously, End of the World is the best film that I’ve ever seen on SyFy.  It was a film that was obviously made by genre fans for genre fans and, as a result, it felt like a belated Valentine’s Day present from the SyFy network to its viewers.

As I previously mentioned, the entire film is basically a collection of references and homages to other science fiction films.  While this is a technique that I’ve found cloying when used by other films, End of the World struck exactly the right tone.  The references were appreciative without over going overboard and, even more importantly, they were cleverly deployed throughout the film.   They moved the film forward and seemed to grow organically out of the action onscreen.  As a result, even with all the references, the film itself never felt heavy-handed.

Greg Grunberg is one of those great actors who can perfectly sell both comedy and drama.  His talents were on perfect display last night.  Perhaps the best Grunberg line of the night was, “It’s a monologue!  MONO!”

Brad Dourif didn’t have a lot of screentime but seriously, he  was just adorable.

Really, the whole film was just adorable.

What Did Not Work?

It all worked.

“Oh my God!  Just Like me!” Moments

Much like the character of Selena (Caroline Cave), I think Greg Grunberg’s pretty awesome.

Lessons Learned

The geeks shall inherit the Earth (but only after the Redheads are finished with it).

Film Review: Django Kill (dir. by Giulio Questi)


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Released in 1967 and directed by Giulio Questi, Django Kill is one of the essential spaghetti westerns.

The film opens with a man literally clawing his way out of a shallow grave.  Played by Tomas Milian and known as the Stranger, the man is a Mexican outlaw who has been buried out in the middle of the desert.  Two sympathetic Indians discover the Stranger and, while they nurse him back to health, he has several flashbacks that explain how he came to be buried alive.

The Stranger was a member of a gang of thieves who stole a cargo of gold.  However, the Americans in the gang betrayed the Mexicans, gunning them down and fleeing with the gold.  The Indians agree to help the Stranger find the rest of his gang on the condition that the Stranger tell them what it was like to be dead.

The Stranger’s former gang, meanwhile, has arrived at a desolate town known as Unhappy Place.  From the minute that the gang first rides into town, we know that there’s something sinister about Unhappy Place.  A naked child stands in the middle of the street while another is used as a footrest by one of the adults.  A distraught woman watches them from behind a barred window.  A lame hedgehog drags itself across the dusty street.  As soon as the gang stops at the local saloon, the locals see the gold that they’re carrying and, in a shockingly brutal scene, the townspeople lynch the outlaws.

While this is going on, the Stranger rides into town.  Spotting the last living outlaw, the Stranger proceeds to gun him down.  In one of the film’s more infamous scenes, when the townspeople learn that the Stranger is using gold bullets, they proceed to literally rip the outlaw to pieces in an effort to retrieve the golden bullets.

With the outlaws dead, the townspeople claim the gold for themselves.  The Stranger, who was apparently more interested in revenge than getting the gold, stays in town and watches as things get increasingly weird.

How weird?

Well, how about the fact that the Stranger ends up having a romance with a crazy woman who spends her days trapped behind a locked door?

Or how about the fact that the Stranger finds himself in the middle of a power struggle between the townspeople and the flamboyantly homosexual Zorro (played, in grandly villainous fashion, by Roberto Camardiel) who rides into town with a gang of cowboys who are all dressed in black outfits with white embroidery?  In another one of the film’s infamous scenes, Zorro and his cowboys kidnap and gang rape the son of the town’s saloonkeeper.

(A young Ray Lovelock, who would go on to be one of the best actors to regularly work in Italian exploitation plays the son.)

Or how about the scene where Zorro plays with a bunch of Civil War figures while arguing with his pet parrot?  When Zorro offers the parrot a drink, the parrot replies, “I want more!”

Or, how about the fact that the Stranger, at one point, has to deal with several vampire bats while literally hanging from a cross?

Graphically violent and full of bizarre and disturbing imagery, Django Kill is one of the strangest westerns ever made and that strangeness keeps the film interesting even when the story doesn’t make much sense.  While Django Kill may not be the masterpiece that several claim it to (the film runs on a bit long and the dubbing of the English language version was absolutely terrible), it’s still one of the most compulsively watchable films that I’ve ever seen.  Just when you think the film can’t get any stranger, it does.

Django Kill was filmed under the title of If You Live, Shoot!  However, in a move typical of Italian cinema, the film was retitled to take advantage of the popularity of Sergio Corbucci’s Django.  The implication, of course, is that Tomas Milian is playing the same character here that Franco Nero played in Corbucci’s film.  Of course, nothing could be further from the truth.  Even in the crudely dubbed English version of the film, Milian is never referred to by name.  Instead, he’s simply known as the Stranger and, appropriately enough, the film feels more like a surreal take on Sergio Leone’s Dollar trilogy as opposed to being a part of the Django series.

That said, regardless of whether it’s a legitimate Django film or not, Django Kill …. If You Live, Shoot! is more than worth watching.  In fact, it’s essential for anyone who loves Italian exploitation films.

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Scenes That I Love: The End of Zabriskie Point


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Released in 1970, Zabriskie Point was the great Italian director Michelangelo Antonioni’s attempt to make the definitive film about both America and the counterculture.  While most critics feel that Antonioni failed on both counts, it is also generally agreed that he captured some beautiful images of an America struggling to definite itself culturally.

The film ends with one of Antonioni’s most iconic images as hippie-turned-revolutionary Daria Halprin watches as her lover’s house explodes.  Is what Daria sees real or is she just fantasizing about the end of capitalism?  Antonioni leaves the answer up to the viewer.

Here are the Razzies!


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I don’t have much respect for the Razzies, to be honest.  They’re more about scoring easy points than actually recognizing the worst films of the year.  Case in point: there is no way that Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 2 was the worst film of 2012.

WORST PICTURE
“Battleship”
“The Oogieloves in Big Balloon Adventure”
“That’s My Boy”
“A Thousand Words”
X — “Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 2”

WORST ACTOR
Nicolas Cage, “Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance” and “Seeking Justice”
Eddie Murphy, “A Thousand Words”
Robert Pattinson, “Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 2”
Tyler Perry, “Alex Cross” and “Good Deeds”
X — Adam Sandler, “That’s My Boy”

WORST ACTRESS
Katherine Heigl, “One for the Money”
Milla Jovovich, “Resident Evil 5: Retribution”
Tyler Perry, “Madea’s Witness Protection”
X — Kristen Stewart, “Snow White and the Huntsman” and “Twlight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 2”
Barbra Streisand, “The Guilt Trip”

WORST SUPPORTING ACTOR
David Hasselhoff, “Pirannha 3DD”
X — Taylor Lautner, “Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 2”
Liam Neeson, “Battleship” and “Wrath of the Titans”
Nick Swardson,  “That’s My Boy”
Vanilla Ice, “That’s My Boy”

WORST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Jessica Biel, “Playing for Keeps” and “Total Recall”
Brooklyn Dekcer, “Battleship” and “What to Expect When You’re Expecting”
Ashley Green, “Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 2”
Jennifer Lopez, “What to Expect When You’re Expecting”
X — Rihanna, “Battleship”

WORST SCREEN ENSEMBLE
“Battleship”
“Madea’s Witness Protection”
“The Oogieloves in Big Balloon Adventure”
“That’s My Boy”
X — “Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 2”

WORST DIRECTOR
Sean Anders, “That’s My Boy”
Peter Berg, “Battleship”
X — Bill Condon, “Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 2”
Tyler Perry, “Good Deeds” and “Madea’s Witness Protection”
John Putch, “Atlas Shrugged: Part II”

 

WORST REMAKE, RIP-OFF or SEQUEL
“Ghost Rider 2: Spirit of Vengeance”
“Madea’s Witness Protection”
“Pirannha 3DD”
“Red Dawn”
X — “Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 2”

WORST SCREEN COUPLE
Any combination of “Jersey Shore” cast members, “The Three Stooges”
X — Mackenzie Foy & Taylor Lautner, “Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 2”
Robert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart, “Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 2”
Tyler Perry & His Drag Get-Up, “Madea’s Witness Protection”
Adam Sandler & Leighton Meester/Andy Samberg/Susan Sarandon, “That’s My Boy”

WORST SCREENPLAY
“Atlas Shrugged: Part II”
“Battleship”
X — “That’s My Boy”
“A Thousand Words”
“Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 2”

Here Are The Winners Of The Independent Spirit Awards


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It was a good day for Silver Linings Playbook.

BEST FEATURE
“Beasts of the Southern Wild”
“Bernie”
“Keep the Lights On”
“Moonrise Kingdom”
X – “Silver Linings Playbook”

BEST DIRECTOR
Wes Anderson, “Moonrise Kingdom”
Julia Loktev, “The Loneliest Planet”
X – David O. Russell, “Silver Linings Playbook”
Ira Sachs, “Keep the LIghts On”
Martin McDonagh, “Seven Psychopaths”

BEST FEMALE LEAD
Linda Cardellini, “Return”
Emayatzy Corinealdi, “Middle of Nowhere”
X – Jennifer Lawrence, “Silver Linings Playbook”
Quvenzhane Wallis, “Beasts of the Southern Wild”
Mary Elizabeth Winstead, “Smashed”

BEST MALE LEAD
Jack Black, “Bernie”
Bradley Cooper, “Silver Linings Playbook”
X – John Hawkes, “The Sessions”
Thur Lindhardt, “Keep the Lights On”
Matthew McConaughey, “Killer Joe”
Wendell Pierce, “Four”

BEST SUPPORTING FEMALE
Rosemarie Dewitt, “Your Sister’s Sister”
Ann Dowd, “Compliance”
X – Helen Hunt, “The Sessions”
Brit Marling, “The Sound of My Voice”
Lorraine Toussaint, “The Middle of Nowhere”

BEST SUPPORTING MALE
X – Matthew McConaughey, “Magic Mike”
David Oyelowo, “Middle of Nowhere”
Sam Rockwell, “Seven Psychopaths”
Bruce Willis, “Moonrise Kingdom”
Michael Pena, “End of Watch”

 

BEST SCREENPLAY
Wes Anderson, Roman Coppola, “Moonrise Kingdom”
Zoe Kazan, “Ruby Sparks”
Martin McDonagh, “Seven Psychopaths”
X – David O. Russell, “Silver Linings Playbook”
Ira Sachs, Mauricio Zacharias, “Keep the Lights On”

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY
Yoni Brook, “Valley of Saints”
Lol Crowley, “Here”
X – Ben Richardson, “Beasts of the Southern Wild”
Roman Vasyanov, “End of Watch”
Robert Yeoman, “Moonrise Kingdom”

BEST FIRST FEATURE
“Fill the Void”
“Gimme the Loot”
“Safety Not Guaranteed”
“Sound of My Voice”
X – “The Perks of Being a Wallflower”

BEST FIRST SCREENPLAY
Rama Burshtein, “Fill the Void”
X – Derek Connolly, “Safety Not Guaranteed”
Christopher Ford, “Robot & Frank”
Rashida Jones, Will McCormack, “Celeste and Jesse Forever”
Jonathan Lisecki, “Gayby”

JOHN CASSAVETES AWARD (best feature under $500,000)
“Breakfast with Curtis”
X – “Middle of Nowhere”
“Mosquita y Mari”
“Starlet”
“The Color Wheel”

BEST DOCUMENTARY 
“How to Survive a Plague”
“Marina Abramovic: The Artist is Present”
“The Central Park Five”
X – “The Invisible War”
“The Waiting Room”

BEST INTERNATIONAL FILM
X – “Amour”
“Once Upon a Time in Anatolia”
“Rust and Bone”
“Sister”
“War Witch”

What Lisa And Evelyn Watched Last Night #70: California Dreams S3E5 “Yoko Oh No!” (dir by Kevin Sullivan)


Last night, my BFF Evelyn and I watched yet another episode of the old 90s sitcom California Dreams.

Why Were We Watching It?

Believe me, I would have much rather have been watching an old episode of Saved By The Bell: The New Class but. unfortunately, YouTube has yanked down nearly every episode of SBTB:TNC that’s ever been uploaded.  However, every episode of California Dreams is available on YouTube.  Why exactly it’s okay to violate California Dreams‘ copyright but not Saved By The Bell’s is a question for which there is no easy answer.

That said, ever since my sister Megan first introduced me to the show last December, I’ve grown to appreciate California Dreams.  For a terrible sitcom, it wasn’t that bad.

What Was It About?

So, in this episode, there’s yet another battle of the bands taking place at Sharky’s.  (I have to admit that there’s still a lot of episodes of California Dreams that I haven’t seen but, seriously, it seems that Sharky’s had a vattle of the bands every other week or so.)  Anyway, the Dreams are looking to win the Battle of the Bands for the 2nd time in a row but they’re going to have to beat Total Defiance, a rap group that’s edgy in a mid-90s, Saturday morning sitcom sort of way.

When Total Defiance’s manager, Rosie, calls Lorena “a groupie,” Lorena (played by Diana Uribe) asks to be allowed to sing with the Dreams.  At this point in the series, Lorena was dating Jake (Jay Anthony Franke), the leader of the Dreams.  So, of course, Lorena is allowed to join the group despite being totally tone deaf.

What Worked?

Though it probably wasn’t meant to be, Rosie’s dismissive description of the California Dreams and their music is actually pretty spot on.

This is a pretty good episode for both the character of Lorena and for the actress who played her.  Though everyone on YouTube seems to disagree with me, I actually think the Jake and Lorena were a good couple and I prefer the episode where she and Jake are together to the ones where Jake is dating Tiffani (Kelly Packard) and Lorena is going out with Sly (Michael Cade).

So, I’ve made my sisters, my boyfriend, my best friend, and my Australian friend watch an episode or two of California Dreams and they’ve all said the same thing: Lorena reminds them of me.  Despite the fact that I doubt that Lorena would ever be a fan of Italian horror, I can see their point.

What Did Not Work?

“Suuuuuuurf dudes with attitude … kinda groovy …. feeling mellow….”  Again, Rosie was right.

“OH MY GOD! Just like me!” Moments

Like Lorena, I’m a good dancer but I can’t sing to save my life.  In fact, my sisters claim that I’m tone deaf but I prefer the term “musically challenged.”

Unlike Lorena, I would never have faked laryngitis to get out of singing.  I would have gotten up on stage and screeched my little heart out.

Lessons Learned

If you want to sing despite having no talent, date a guy in a band.

6 Trailers For 6 Films That Won 0 Oscars


Hi!  For this week’s edition of Lisa Marie’s Favorite Grindhouse and Exploitation Film Trailers, we will be taking a look at a few trailers for a few films that were not honored by the Academy.

1) Alien From L.A. (1988)

2) The Adventures of Hercules (1985)

From director Luigi Cozzi!

3) Blood Games (1990)

4) The Haunting of Morella (1990)

5) The Blood of Fu Manchu (1968)

From director Jess Franco!

6) Blown Away (1992)

What do you think, Trailer Kitty?

Trailer Kitty

The SPM Trilogy Revisited : “Slumber Party Massacre II”


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By 1987, I’m not sure that anyone was expecting Roger Corman to trot out a sequel to The Slumber Party Massacre. Sure, the movie had gained something of a cult following thanks to the VHS rental market (it did rather middling business at the box office upon its initial release), but it had been a few years and since most “slasher” sequels at the time tended to pop up within a year or two of the first flick (heck, that’s pretty much still the case), I think it’s pretty safe to say that the general feeling at the time was  that SPM was a one-and-done deal.

We all should have known better, or course. When you’ve got an ultra-simple premise that can be filmed cheaply and quickly using just a couple of different locations, and the original turned a profit (however modest), then there’s no way Corman’s not gonna go back to that well at some point. And so it came to pass that, five years on from its progenitor, Slumber Party Massacre II saw the light of day.

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Needless to say, times had changed in the half-decade between the two films. While not strictly a straight-to-video release since Corman was still pulling together limited theatrical runs for all his product at the time (mostly in the Southern California area), those were really just a clevver way to essentially pull “focus group” test audiences together (and have them pay for the privilege of being guinea pigs rather than vice-versa!) to make sure the end result more or less had the effect on folks that it was supposed to. Pretty much all the action for the second Slumber Party Massacre was going to be on home video, and ol’ Roger knew it  — hence a smaller cast, fewer sets, and, I’m willing to bet, probably an even smaller budget (at least in terms of adjusted-for-inflation dollars). Heck, this thing even clocks in with a slightly shorter run time than its predecessor, if you can believe that, at a paltry 75 minutes!

One thing about the SPM modus operandi that Corman didn’t change, though, was hiring a young, relatively fresh-outta-film-school woman to direct the thing, his hire in those case being one Deborah Brock, who also wrote the script.

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To Brock’s credit, she tried to do something a little bit different — and, dare I say, maybe even a little bit more ambitious — than the average low-budget, essentially-DTV slasher sequel allows for with this movie. To her discredit, what she tried doesn’t exactly work. To wit:

Our story here centers around a young gal named Courtney (Crystal Bernard, who would go on to star on the long-running TV sitcom Wings), who just so happens to be the younger sister of the “final girl” from the first Slumber Party Massacre flick. Courtney fronts an all-girl rock band (gotta vary it up from the high school basketball team premise at least a little bit) that’s headed to a rental condo for weekend of fun n’ semi-naked games with their boyfriends. There’s just one problem, though — she’s also been suffering from horribly vivid nightmares involving things like refrigerated whole chickens coming to life and her friend’s acne boiling, pulsating, throbbing, and eventually exploding all over the place. The one constant in all of these bad dreams, though, is an unnamed “devil rocker” (he’s referred to in the credits only as the “Driller Killer” and is played by Atanas Ilitch, who looks more than just a bit like a young Andrew Dice Clay) who terrorizes Courtney and her gal pals with a murderously-retrofitted guitar that’s equipped with a long, uber- phallic (again) power-drill for a neck.

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Needless to say, once the weekend revelries get going, things don’t go quite as planned, and Courtney, her fellow girl-group rockers, and their fellas are soon experiencing a very violent reduction in their numbers at the hands of the “driller killer,” who turns out to be very real indeed.

Or is he? And that, my friends, is the crux of Slumber Party II‘s problem in a nutshell (besides the fact that the “real” killings don’t start taking place until just after the halfway point of the flick). At first, the whole “is this the real life, is this just fantasy?” (sorry, Freddie!) gimmick is kinda neat, but it definitely starts to wear on the average viewer’s nerves after awhile, and Brock’s decision not to delineate in much of any way what’s actual from what isn’t ultimately makes for kind of a confusing experience. Still, you figure that in a genre this (for the most part) cut-and-dried, things are bound to make sense by the end, right?

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Well, not so fast. Brock throws us not one, not two, but three rapid-fire concluding twists that never end up leaving  us with a satisfactory explanation as to whether or not the events we’ve just witnessed “really” happened or not. When we finally learn that Courtney’s locked up in a loony bin, three distinct possibilities emerge —  either it  was all a dream-within-a-dream in her disturbed mind, or she killed all her friends and this “driller killer” is some alternate persona she’s created in order to absolve herself of any guilt, or it all actually happened, she survived, and the ordeal drove her over the brink. And when the “driller killer” pops up again right before the credits roll, this time in the sanitarium with Courtney, Brock doesn’t in the least bit clue us in as to whether he’s there in the flesh or only in her erstwhile heroine’s admittedly traumatized psyche.

Some folks might find this lack of anything even resembling a concrete resolution interesting, maybe even a bit exciting. Hell, we all like to think for ourselves, right? Unfortunately, Courtney and her cohorts are such a largely uninteresting lot that most of us can’t really be bothered to care all that much about solving this film’s wanna-be-mind-fucking puzzle. And the “driller killer” himself is so OTT, and stripped of any pretense of motivation for his murder n’ mayhem, that he never seems “real” enough to make the purported “mystery” all that involving. The whole thing rings both flat and hollow to this wannabe-critic, at the very least.

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Like the other pics in this soon-to-be-concluded little mini-round-up we’re doing here, Slumber Party Massacre II is available on a two-DVD set from Shout! Factory entitled, appropriately enough, “The Slumber Party Massacre Collection,” which is part of their larger “Roger Corman’s Cult Classics” series. It’s sporting a nicely-remastered widescreen transfer, has good 2.0 stereo sound, and there are extras aplenty including a fairly comprehensive little “making-of” featurette, a full-length commentary from writer/director Brock, a poster and still image gallery, the original theatrical trailer, some trailers for other flicks in this series, and a liner notes booklet by SPM historian Jason Paul Collum. While I may not consider this a great movie by any means, this is certainly a great DVD package.

Still,  ya know what? Flaws n’ all, I’d still go so far as to say that the film itself is at least worth a look. I do admire Brock for her willingness to break the mold and think outside of the usual slasher box. Her intentions for this flick strike me as being pretty solid, and as almost-innovative as her budget would allow for — she just fails in her execution. And let’s face it — a slasher movie that can’t execute properly is saddled with a problem it can never overcome.

Scenes That I Love: Charles Freck Gets A Good Wine in A Scanner Darkly


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First released in 2006, Richard Linklater’s A Scanner Darkly is one of the unacknowledged great films of the past ten years.  The scene below, featuring Rory Cochrane as the hapless Charles Freck, is all the stronger for being adapted almost word-for-word from Philip K. Dick’s source novel.