Taso Papadakis | Through the Shattered Lens

Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Thursdays, I will be reviewing Malibu CA, which aired in Syndication in 1998 and 1999. The entire show is currently streaming on YouTube!

This week, a mudslide changes everything …. kind of.

Episode 1.12 “The Big Storm”

(Dir by Gary Shimokawa, originally aired on January 10th, 1999)

Stads and Jason are coming up on their big, six-month anniversary! Stads wants to celebrate at a volleyball tournament. Jason wants to celebrate at the “Puff Daddy” concert. You can really tell how old this show is by the fact that 1) they’re still calling him “Puff Daddy” and 2) they’re taking seriously the idea of wanting to see him in concert.

With Stads annoyed that Jason never seems to want to do anything that she wants to do, Jason turns to Sam for advice. Sam says that Jason should drive into Beverly Hills and buy a necklace that Stads wants. Sam even accompanies Jason on the drive. Awww! What a good freind.

But then — oh no! — a storm hits. Jason and Sam end up getting trapped in their car by a mudslide. Trapped together, Jason and Sam share a kiss. Its a big moment that would have been bigger if it made any sense. Seriously, until that moment, Sam had never shown any interest in Jason whatsoever. But now, suddenly, they’re kissing and preparing to die together. I understand that it’s probably mudslide panic but still, it just feels as if it comes out of nowhere.

Fortunately, Jason and Sam are rescued by the lifeguards (including Stads). Jason and Sam agree not to tell Stads about the kiss. Jason also gives Stads the necklace (Awwww! It’s a nice necklace!) and then suggests that, instead of seeing Puff Daddy, they just have a romantic dinner. Stads agrees.

Unfortunately, at dinner, Stads says that she knows what happened in the car. Jason says the kiss didn’t mean anything, just to discover that Stads was just referring to Jason and Sam talking in general. Stads gives Jason back his necklace and then dumps him. Good for Stads, she deserves better!

This is one of those storylines that would have worked better if I actually cared about any of the characters on the show but, for the most part, everyone is so shallow that it’s hard to really get worked up when they get trapped in a mudslide. As well, it would have helped if Sam had ever previously shown any interest in Jason. As well, while Jason did have a crush on Sam when the show began, that didn’t seem to last long. Two people who produce absolutely no romantic sparks shared a kiss. It didn’t really do much for me.

As often happens with this show, the B-plots were better than the main plot, largely because Brandon Brooks and Priscilla Inga Taylor were both willing to full embrace the absurdity of their characters. After Peter told Murray to stop talking so much, Murray resorted to typing his words out on his laptop and having a computerized voice repeat them. That made me laugh. Meanwhile, Tracy — who is now dating Kip, the dumb lifeguard from the previous episode — explored her artistic side by getting a camera and taking pictures of a shirtless Scott wearing an Abraham Lincoln beard. It was weird enough to be funny.

Anyway, Stads has escaped Jason …. for now. Run, Stads, run!

Summer forever! Hey, who wants to go to a costume party on the beach? Like, seriously, why would you even do that?

Episode 1.10 “The Costume Party”

(Dir by Gary Shimokawa, originally aired on December 13th, 1998)

Well, this is sure stupid.

This week, Jason once again proves himself to be the world’s worst boyfriend by getting jealous just because Stads is working with a totally hot lifeguard named Kip (Taso Papadikis). Jason fears that Stads will dump him for Kip, just because Kip happens to be better-looking and a lot more athletic than Jason.

Scott proves himself to be the world’s worst brother by suggesting that Jason flirt with Tracy in order to make Stads jealous. Jason does so, not knowing that Stads has absolutely no romantic interest at all in Kip because Kip’s dumb. Stads, however, doesn’t know that Jason is just flirting with Tracy to make her jealous and she starts to get insecure about their relationship. Stads, being a doormat, doesn’t realize that a decent boyfriend wouldn’t be flirting with another girl right in front of her in the first place.

Sam proves herself to be the world’s worst friend by suggesting that Stads make Scott jealous by flirting with Kip. Stads flirts with Kip. Jason responds by continuing to flirt with Tracy. Eventually, Scott and Sam realize that they’ve royally screwed things up but it’s too late. Jason and Stads have already broken up.

Luckily, there’s a costume party on the pier! Because seriously, who wouldn’t want to go a hot beach in a suffocating costume? Thinking that Stads is dressed as an astronaut and that Jason is dressed as a gorilla, Scott dressed up like a gorilla and pretends to be Jason. What he and Sam don’t know is that Stads and Jason switched costumes. So, when Scott tries to give a romantic note to who he thinks is Stads, he actually gives it to Jason.

As you can probably guess, this leads to Jason and Scott holding each other tight and dancing while the audience whoops it up. If this sounds familiar, it’s because the exact same joke was used on Saved By The Bell and a host of other Peter Engel-produced sitcoms. In the Engelverse, there’s apparently nothing funnier than two guys dancing together.

This was a pretty dumb episode but, surprisingly enough, Murray’s antics did make me laugh this week. Having forgotten the security code to his house, Murray moves in with the Collins family. First, he’s a slob. Then, he’s a neat freak. In the end, he dresses up like the Silver Surfer and runs around the costume party. It was silly but Brandon Brooks really went all-out in the role and, for once, the character’s weirdness made me smile.

Otherwise, this was all pretty dumb. Seriouisly, Stads …. you deserve better!