Welcome to Late Night Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past!  On Saturdays, I will be reviewing the Canadian sitcom, Check it Out, which ran in syndication from 1985 to 1988.  The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!

Check It Out is a show that I recently came across on Tubi.  It’s a Canadian sitcom from the late 80s, one that took place in grocery store.  Don Adams starred as Howard Bannister, the store’s manager.  Dinah Christie played Edna, who was Howard’s girlfriend and secretary.  Kathleen Laskey, Aaron Schwartz, and Tonya Williams played cashiers.  Jeff Pustil played the assistant manager.  The security guard was played by Henry Beckman and Simon Reynolds played a teenage bagboy.  Since I had never heard of this show before, I figured why not review it?  What’s the worst that could happen?

Besides, check out the totally funky theme song!

Episode 1.1 “No Security In Security”

(Dir by Ari Dikijian, originally aired on October 2nd, 1985)

Welcome to Cobb’s, perhaps the most depressing location that I’ve ever seen for a Canadian sitcom.  Cobb’s is a grocery store and, interestingly enough, it actually looks like a grocery store, with cheap displays, bored employees, and floors that you can tell are probably sticky.  Usually, most sitcoms — especially sitcoms that aired in the 80s — go out of their way to try to look inviting.  From the minute we see Cobb’s, the show seems to be telling us, “Run away!  Shop elsewhere!”

As the pilot opens, store manager Howard Bannister (Don Adams) watches as a security specialist named Vicker (Gordon Clapp) installs several new security cameras.  Howard asks what channels the cameras get.  Vicker replies that you can watch produce, you can watch the front doors, and you can watch the registers.  Howard weakly tries to explain that he was making a joke.  It goes over Vicker’s head.

You know what isn’t a joke?  The fact that Mrs. Cobb (Barbara Hamilton), the fearsome owner of the store, now expects Howard to fire Alf (Henry Beckham), the ancient security guard who has been working at Cobb’s for his entire life.  Howard is reluctant to fire an old man, despite the fact that everyone keeps talking about the fact that Alf is not that good at his job.  The assistant manager, Jack Christian (Jeff Pustil), volunteers to do the firing but Howard says that it’s the type of the thing that should be done by the manager.  After getting an angry visit from Mrs. Cobb, Howard takes Alf outside and fires him.  Alf responds by punching Howard in the stomach.

Well, I guess it’s a good thing that they fired Alf!  Seriously, violence is never the answer!  Still, Howard feels so guilty that he can’t perform sexually with his girlfriend and secretary, Edna Moseley (Dinah Christie).  But, don’t worry!  Alf calls in a bomb threat and gets his job back….

Seriously, that’s the plot of the first episode.  It’s a plot that had some potential.  One of The Office‘s best episodes was the Halloween episode where Michael was forced to fire Devin.  On The Office, the story was more about Michael’s fear of being the bad guy than the actual firing.  Michael knows that he has to fire someone but he’s just scared to death of getting anyone mad at him.  Things are a bit less complicated on Check it Out.  Alf is terrible at his job but Howard doesn’t want to fire him because he’s old.  Fortunately, all it takes is a fake bomb threat to get Alf’s job back.

It was a bit of a forgettable episode, though it introduced the characters and that’s what a pilot is supposed to do.  The main problem is that, with the exception of Gordon Clapp’s performance as Vicker, the episode itself just wasn’t that funny.

Maybe the second episode was an improvement!  We’ll find out next week!