As some of our regular readers undoubtedly know, I am involved in a few weekly live tweets on twitter. I host #FridayNightFlix every Friday, I co-host #ScarySocial on Saturday, and I am one of the five hosts of #MondayActionMovie! Every week, we get together. We watch a movie. We tweet our way through it.
Tonight, at 10 pm et, #FridayNightFlix has got 1990’s The Shrimp on the Barbie!
Watch it and cheer for Cheech Marin in Australia!
If you want to join us this Friday, just hop onto twitter, start the movie at 10 pm et, and use the #FridayNightFlix hashtag! It’s a friendly group and welcoming of newcomers so don’t be shy.
The Shrimp on the Barbie is available on Prime and Tubi! See you there!
Actually, wind farms are not at all romantic. Instead, they are big ugly eyesores that usually ruin an otherwise perfect view. They kill hundreds of birds a year and they also don’t generate as much power as advertised. I know that we’re all supposed to love wind farms but, to me, they always bring to mind a dystopian hellscape. Seeing them off the side of the road is like seeing an abandoned oil derrick. They’re just creepy.
Don’t tell that to the boys from O-Town, though. To them, there’s nothing more romantic than running around a wind farm and singing about how they’re going to skydive into their girlfriend’s heart. If you are going to skydive, I would suggest doing it away from a wind farm because can you imagine accidentally landing on one of those monstrous windmill things? And even if the members of O-Town do avoid the windmills, there are also a lot of powerlines in this video. Maybe, instead of going to a wind farm, they could have celebrated their anniversary at a nice restaurant.
My sister swears that O-Town stood for Orgasm Town but actually, it was a reference to the band being from Orlando. If they’re from Orlando, why are they in the middle of the desert? If I was that close to Disney World, you wouldn’t find me running around some wind farm. You would find me in line to enter the Haunted Mansion for the 100th time.
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Thursdays, I will be reviewing City Guys, which ran on NBC from 1997 to 2001. The entire show is currently streaming on Tubi!
Oh, Hell, it’s that time of week, isn’t it? It’s time to watch City Guys.
Episode 4.2 “The Users”
(Dir by Frank Bonner, originally aired on September 23rd, 2000)
It’s midterm time!
Wasn’t it midterm time two episodes ago? And the episode before that? And maybe even before that? My point is that Manny High seems to have a lot of midterms. I mean, when I was in high school and college, you only took midterms once per semester because you could only be halfway through once. Manny High has midterms every week!
Chris and Jamal are not only worried about passing their midterms. They’re also concerned about what to do with Jasper, who is their new techie at the student radio station. Jasper is very friendly and a very exuberant and very annoying. Chris and Jamal feel that he’s trying too hard to be edgy and street and that’s really saying something when you consider that Chris and Jamal are the two biggest phonies not named Al at Manny High. Jasper also appears to be in his 30s but he swears that he’s a student and that he’s got a straight-A average. Chris and Jamal befriend Jasper so that he’ll tutor them but, when they get a chance to score an internship with a bigtime radio DJ, Chris and Jamal conspire to keep Jasper from finding out. (Oh my God, they’re just using Jasper! They’re users! The episode’s title makes sense!) After sending Jamal across town to pick up a fictional lunch order, Chris does his crappy Homer Simpson impersonation and the DJ is so impressed that it’s suddenly easy to understand why people eventually stopped listening to the radio. Unfortunately, Jasper makes his way to back to the radio station earlier than expected, finds out about the internship, and gets his feelings hurt. Realizing that they are the two worst people in the world, Chis and Jamal apologize to him.
“Yo yo, Jas,” Jamal says, “We didn’t mean to diss you, man.”
“Yeah,” Chris says, “we decided to give you some props.”
Yeah, guys, Jasper is definitely the one who is trying too hard….
(I am dramatically rolling my eyes.)
Anyway, Chris, Jamal, and Jasper all get the internship but, fortunately, it’s a summer internship so I guess we won’t actually have to watch any of the undoubtedly wacky adventures that they’ll have together.
Meanwhile, Ms. Noble is yelling at everyone. You would think that this would lead to all the students finally figuring out that their principal is not their friends but instead, Dawn, Cassidy, and Al discover that Ms. Noble is having man trouble and they decide to fix things between her and her boyfriend. (Her boyfriend, by the way, is the same guy that Ms. Noble had nostalgia sex with last week.) It turns out that her boyfriend has been working late every night because he’s been trying to save up enough money to buy Ms. Noble an engagement ring. He proposes to her at the crappy diner where all the students hang out. The audience goes crazy. Cassidy and Dawn get tears in their eyes. People — SHE’S THE PRINCIPAL! NOBODY IN HISTORY OF HIGH SCHOOL HAS EVER CARED THIS MUCH ABOUT THEIR PRINCIPAL!
God, this show is annoying. Let’s move on!
Episode 4.3 “Cheat Happens”
(Dir by Frank Bonner, originally aired on September 30th, 2000)
Mid-terms are over and it’s time for finals. We’re only three episodes into the series and it’s already time for finals? What the heck? Anyway, Jamal says he’s not worried about his chemistry final because “this brother’s all about chemistry.” Plus, Jamal says, “Jamal ain’t down with summer school.”
“Bam! Bam! Bam!” Chris later shouts, as he turns in his final. Chris is feeling confident because he and Jamal made cheat sheets for the final. Even though they lost the cheat sheets, Chris and Jamal apparently learned everything about Chemistry while making them. Unfortunately, it turns out that they accidentally put the cheat sheets in L-Train’s textbook and when Ms. Noble spots the sheets, she accuses L-Train of cheating. When L-Train refuses to confess to cheating, Ms. Noble announces that the entire class will have to retake the test. Everyone blames L-Train. Chris and Jamal are the worst human beings ever.
That said, Chris and Jamal may be terrible but at least they know how to host a radio show. On the other hand, when Dawn and Cassidy demand to be allowed to host their own radio show, they totally blow it. I guess telling terrible jokes and doing lame impersonations is a lot more difficult than it looks. Luckily, Dawn and Cassidy get a second chance and, by making fun of the boys, they’re a success! Yay! I don’t know what the future episodes of this show may hold but I have a feeling that we will never again hear a word about Dawn and Cassidy’s radio show.
Anyway, after L-Train nearly gets into a fight trying to defend his honor, Chris and Jamal confess and Ms. Noble replies, “I’ll see you in summer school!” So, I guess that internship’s off! That’ll teach Chris and Jamal to be honest.
4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!
On this day, 109 years ago, Martin Ritt was born in New York City. Like many of the Hollywood directors who came to prominence in the 1950s, he started his directorial career in the theater before moving over to live TV. In 1952, his television career was derailed when he was accused of being a communist. Blacklisted, it would be five years before Ritt could get another directing job. When he did start to work again, he moved from television into the movies, starting with 1957’s Edge of the City. Perhaps due to his own experiences, his films always had a social conscience and always defended the individual against corrupt corporations and governments. In 1976, he directed one of the first films about the Hollywood blacklist, The Front.
As a director, Ritt was known for his skill with actors. More than anyone, he played a huge role in making stars out of both Paul Newman and Sally Field. He was also one of the few directors to understand how to harness Richard Burton’s self-destructive tendencies and, as a result, Burton gave one of his best performances in Ritt’s adaptation of The Spy Who Came In From The Cold.
It’s time for….
4 Shots From 4 Martin Ritt Films
Edge of the City (1957, dir by Martin Ritt, DP: Joseph Brun)
The Long Hot Summer (1958, dir by Martin Ritt, DP: Joseph LaShelle)
Hud (1963, dir by Martin Ritt, DP: James Wong Howe)
The Spy Who Came In From The Cold (1965, dir by Martin Ritt, DP: Oswald Morris)
Poor Ashlee Simpson. I mean, she danced one stupid jig on Saturday Night Live and the world has never let her forget it. Of course, I would probably be more on Ashlee’s side if she hadn’t initially blamed her band for the screw-up. That wasn’t nice but, at the time, Ashlee was only 19 and the amount of ridicule that was directed her way was more than a little over-the-top. She probably handled it better than I would have at that age.
Today’s music video of the day comes to us from Ashlee Simpson.
In Shadow, Ashlee sings about existing in someone else’s shadow and the struggle to find your real identity. Needless to say, it’s usually assumed that this song is about being the younger sister of Jessica Simpson but Ashlee has insisted that it’s just about finding yourself. Personally, I think it can be both. The video features a happy blonde Ashlee co-existing with an angrier brunette Ashlee. It’s easy to see the blonde Ashlee as being a stand-in for Jessica, though I think blonde Ashlee is more meant to represent the pressure on Ashlee to be as popular as her sister.
If it sounds like I’ve given this video too much, all I can say is that I’ve got sisters and I can relate.
Welcome to Retro Television Reviews, a feature where we review some of our favorite and least favorite shows of the past! On Wednesdays, I will be reviewing the original Love Boat, which aired on ABC from 1977 to 1986! The series can be streamed on Paramount Plus!
This week, Julie’s parents set sail on The Love Boat!
Episode 2.3 “Rocky/Julie’s Dilemma/Who’s Who?”
(Dir by Allen Baron and Roger Duchowny, originally aired on September 23rd, 1978)
Julie is super-excited because her parents, Bill (Norman Fell) and Martha (Betty Garrett), are going to be on this cruise. Her parents, meanwhile, are only slightly excited about seeing where Julie works and getting to see all of the members of the crew. They would perhaps be more excited if not for the fact that they’re planning on getting a divorce as soon as the cruise is over. They haven’t told Julie, of course. In fact, they tell Captain Stubing before they tell Julie. Why would they tell someone whom they’ve only know for ten minutes before they would tell their own daughter? What awful parents!
When they do eventually tell Julie, she has an emotional breakdown and runs through the corridors of the ship, sobbing. Listen, I’ve been there. When my parents told me that they were getting divorced, I had a difficult time with it as well. Of course, I was twelve years old, whereas Julie is in her late 20s. Still, it’s never easy. Fortunately, Julie realizes that her parents still love each other so she just sets them up with different people on the boat so that they can get jealous and fall back in love. And it works! Julie’s parents get back together….
Which is nice, I guess. I mean, one doesn’t watch The Love Boat because one wants to see a realistic story about the complexities of love and marriage. Still, the show made it look so simple that it got on my nerves. It’s not that simple and any actual child of divorce can tell you that. Again, it’s The Love Boat so perhaps I shouldn’t judge too harshly but I would have had so much more respect for the show if Bill and Martha had told Julie that they were still getting a divorce at the end of the cruise. It would have been a lot more honest than presenting a story where a marriage can be saved by wishful thinking.
While Julie was trying to save her parent’s marriage and prevent several years of awkward holidays, a young girl named Rocky (Melissa Gilbert) was developing her first crush on a boy named Norman (Jimmy Baio). It was actually a sweet little story and both Melissa Gilbert and Jimmy Baio gave likable performances. When Rocky learned that her family would be moving after the cruise, she was upset until she learned that their new home would be in El Paso, which was also where Norman and his family lived. Again, it was simple but sweet. And it went along well with the divorce storyline. While one relationship nearly ended, another began.
Finally, in the silliest story of the week, TV network censor Pat (Dody Goodman) boards the ship and is told that she will be sharing a cabin with Marion Atkins. That’s fine with Pat. Her main concern is making sure that nothing shocking or sordid happens on the cruise. However, it turns out that Marion Atkins (played by James Coco) is actually a guy! Fortunately, Marion turns out to be just as puritanical as Pat. He even brings a bunch of pamphlets on chastity with him for the cruise. Pat and Marion first meet while wandering around the ship and they fall very chastely in love. Since their morals forbid them from following each other to their cabin, they somehow manage to go nearly the entire cruise without realizing that they are living together. When they do realize that they’re cabinmates, they resolve to get married as soon as the boat docks. This whole story was just incredibly dumb and not in a fun way either. Obviously, The Love Boat was taking a swipe at the same network censors who probably insisted that the show be relatively discreet about what was going on behind the closed doors of the ship’s cabins. But Pat and Marion were both so incredibly clueless that it was hard to care about them one way or the other.
This was a bit of uneven episode but, in the end, the boat still looked like a fun place on which to hang out and work. And really, that’s the important thing.
4 Shots From 4 Films is just what it says it is, 4 shots from 4 of our favorite films. As opposed to the reviews and recaps that we usually post, 4 Shots From 4 Films lets the visuals do the talking!
Today, the Shattered Lens wishes a happy 57th birthday to Zack Snyder! Zack Snyder has been a favorite (and occasionally a not-so-favorite) of many of the people who have written for this site. Speaking for myself, I loved Sucker Punch and disliked Man of Steel. (Arleigh, for the record, liked both.) But Snyder is a filmmaker about whom no one seems to be neutral. That’s definitely something of which to take some pride. I was not a fan of the whole idea behind the Oscar Fan Favorite nonsense last year, there was something satisfying about both of those awards being won by films directed by a man who Hollywood has often tried to dismiss.
In honor of Zack Snyder’s birthday, here are….
4 Shots From 4 Films
300 (2003, dir by Zack Snyder, DP: Larry Fong)
Sucker Punch (2011, dir by Zack Snyder: DP: Larry Fong)
Man of Steel (2013, dir by Zack Snyder, DP: Amir Mokri)
Zack Snyder’s Justice League (2021, dir by Zack Snyder, DP: Fabian Wagner)
For today’s music video of the day, we travel back to the innocent days of 2003! That was the year when Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey taught a generation about the meaning of love. Or something like that.
In this video, Jessica Simpsons sings about the “sweetest sin,” which was apparently having sex with your husband. Today, it’s easy to forget all the attention that was given to the marriage of Jessica and Nick and how every story about the couple found room to mention that Jessica “waited” until marriage. (Whether Nick waited never seemed to be much of a concern.) Looking back on it, it was actually a bit creepy the way that singers like Jessica Simpson, Britney Spears, the Jonas Brothers, and so many others were sold as being both sex symbols and icons of chastity. Both sex and virginity were big money makers in the early aughts.
Of course, Jessica herself always came across as being genuinely sweet. The recording of this song was actually featured on an episode of Newlyweds: Nick and Jessica. The episode was famous for a scene in which the Columbia Record execs ordered Jessica to “simplify” the song so that it would be easier for her fans to sing along with. Jessica broke into tears but Nick volunteered to help her out. Viewers were so busy going, “Awwwwww!” that it’s possible they missed just how messed up it was that Jessica didn’t really have any control over her music. That’s another thing about the early aughts. It was a time when managers and record execs openly bragged about dumbing down music and everyone acted like that was totally acceptable. (Just think about Lou Pearlman, going on national televison and literally salivating over the idea of putting together another vaguely anonymous boy band.)
The video features Jessica and Nick on the beach and they sure do look like their in love! Of course, Nick disappears at the end of the video so …. well, that couldn’t represent anything, could it? I mean, there’s no need to read between the lines here, is there? Two years after this video was shot, Jessica filed for divorce and true love died. Actually, that’s being a little overdramatic. Still, it was kind of sad.
Here are the picks of the Costume Designers Guild for the best costume design of 2022!
Excellence in Sci-Fi / Fantasy Film
“Avatar: The Way of Water” – Deborah L. Scott
“Black Panther: Wakanda Forever” – Ruth E. Carter “Everything Everywhere All at Once”- Shirley Kurata
“Hocus Pocus 2” – Salvador Perez
“Thor: Love and Thunder” – Mayes C. Rubeo
Excellence in Contemporary Film “Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery” – Jenny Eagan
“Nope” – Alex Bovaird
“Tár” – Bina Daigeler
“Top Gun: Maverick” – Marlene Stewart
“Women Talking” – Quita Alfred
Excellence in Period Film
“Babylon” – Mary Zophres
“Don’t Worry Darling” – Arianne Phillips “Elvis” – Catherine Martin
“Mrs. Harris Goes to Paris” – Jenny Beavan
“The Woman King” – Gersha Phillips
Excellence in Sci-Fi / Fantasy Television “House of the Dragon: The Heirs of the Dragon” – Jany Temime
“The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power: A Shadow of the Past” – Kate Hawley
“Westworld: Generation Loss” – Debra Beebe
“What We Do in the Shadows: The Wedding” – Laura Montgomery
“The Witcher: Blood Origin: Of Mages, Malice, and Monstrous Mayhem” – Lucinda Wright
Excellence in Contemporary Television
“Emily in Paris: What’s it All About…” – Marylin Fitoussi
“Euphoria: Trying to Get to Heaven Before They Close the Door” – Heidi Bivens
“Hacks: The Captain’s Wife” – Kathleen Felix-Hager “Wednesday: Wednesday’s Child is Full of Woe” – Colleen Atwood & Mark Sutherland
“The White Lotus: In the Sandbox” – Alex Bovaird
Excellence in Period Television
“Bridgerton: The Choice” – Sophie Canale “The Crown: Ipatiev House” – Amy Roberts
“The Gilded Age: Let the Tournament Begin” – Kasia Walicka-Maimone
“The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel: Maisel vs. Lennon: The Cut Contest” – Donna Zakowska
“Pam & Tommy: I Love You, Tommy” – Kameron Lennox
Excellence in Variety, Reality-Competition, Live Television
“Beauty and the Beast: A 30th Celebration” – Marina Toybina
“Dancing with the Stars: Halloween Night” – Daniela Gschwendtner & Steven Norman Lee “Lizzo’s Watch Out for the Big Grrrls: Girl Run That Sh*t Back” – Carrie Cramer & Jason Rembert
“RuPaul’s Secret Celebrity Drag Race: RuPaul-A-Palooza!” – Tony Iniguez
“Saturday Night Live: Miles Teller/Kendrick Lamar” – Tom Broecker, Ashley Dudek & Cristina Natividad
Excellence in Short Form Design
Disney+ Has All the GOATs (Commercial) – Melissa DesRosiers
McDonald’s: Black Panther: Wakanda Forever (Commercial) – Sarah Kinsumba
Nike: Father Time (Commercial) – Shawna Trpcic (For Jason Momoa)
Not Today Flu feat. Jason Alexander (Commercial) – Dawn Ritz Yeah Yeah Yeahs: “Spitting Off the Edge of the World” (Music Video) – Natasha Newman-Thomas
The Golden Reel Awards, honoring the best in 2022 Sound Editing, were handed out on Monday by the Motion Pictures Sound Editors. Top Gun: Maverick may not be picking up the Best Picture Oscar but I bet it’s got Best Sound in the bag.
Here are the Golden Reel winners:
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Feature Effects / Foley Avatar: The Way of Water
The Batman
Everything Everywhere All at Once
Jurassic World: Dominion
Nope Top Gun: Maverick
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Feature Dialogue / ADR The Banshees of Inisherin
The Batman
Elvis
Empire of Light
Everything Everywhere All at Once
Top Gun: Maverick
Outstanding Achievement in Music Editing – Feature Motion Picture Elvis
Everything Everywhere All at Once
Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio
Tár
Whitney Houston: I Wanna Dance with Somebody
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Feature Animation
DC League of Super-Pets Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio
Lightyear
Puss in Boots: The Last Wish
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Feature Documentary Good Night Oppy
Louis Armstrong’s Black and Blues
Moonage Daydream
The Territory
Outstanding Achievement in Music Editing – Documentary
Louis Armstrong’s Black and Blues Moonage Daydream
My Life as a Rolling Stone: Mick Jagger
The Way Down: Revelations
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Foreign Language Feature All Quiet on the Western Front
Argentina, 1985
Bardo, False Chronicle of a Handful of Truths
EO
The Quiet Girl
Triangle of Sadness
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Broadcast Animation
Jurassic World: Camp Cretaceous – “The Last Stand” Love, Death & Robots – “In Vaulted Halls Entombed”
Tales of The Jedi – “The Sith Lord”
Transformers: Earthspark – “Age of Evolution”
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Non-theatrical Feature
Pinocchio Prey
Weird: The Al Yankovic Story
Women of the Movement
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Non-theatrical Animation
The Ice Age Adventures of Buck Wild
Jurassic World: Camp Cretaceous – “Hidden Adventure”
Lego Star Wars Summer Vacation Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Movie
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Non-theatrical Documentary Formula 1: Drive to Survive: Gloves Are Off
George Carlin’s American Dream
Lucy and Desi
Selena Gomez: My Mind and Me
Tony Hawk – Until The Wheels Fall Off
Trainwreck: Woodstock ’99: Kerosene, Match. Boom!
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Broadcast Long Form Effects / Foley Andor – “Reckoning”
Better Call Saul – “Carrot and Stick”
Gaslit – “Year of the Rat”
The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power – “Udûn” Stranger Things: Chapter Seven – “The Massacre at Hawkins Lab”
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Broadcast Long Form Dialogue / ADR
Better Call Saul – “Saul Gone” The Crown – “Gunpowder”
The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power – “Udûn”
Severance – “The We We Are”
Stranger Things: Chapter Seven – “The Massacre at Hawkins Lab”
Outstanding Achievement in Music Editing – Broadcast Long Form
The L Word: Generation Q – “Questions for the Universe”
The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power: “Alloyed”
Severance – “The We We Are” Stranger Things: Chapter Nine – “The Piggyback”
Wednesday – “A Murder of Woes”
The White Lotus – “Bull Elephants”
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Broadcast Short Form
Barry – “710N” The Bear – “Review”
Only Murders in the Building – “Framed”
She Hulk – “Ribbit and Rip It”
Wild Babies – “Big Families”
Outstanding Achievement in Music Editing – Broadcast Short Form
Love, Death & Robots – “Night of the Mini Dead Pitch Perfect: Bumper in Berlin – “Torschlusspanik”
Russian Doll – “Matryoshka”
She-Hulk: Attorney at Law – “Is This Not Real Magic?”
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Game Effects / Foley
Call of Duty: Modern Warfare II
Destiny 2: The Witch Queen God of War Ragnarök
Horizon Forbidden West
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Game Dialogue / ADR
Call of Duty: Modern Warfare II
God of War Ragnarök
Horizon Forbidden West Immortality
Outstanding Achievement in Music Editing – Game Music
Call of Duty: Modern Warfare II God of War Ragnarök
Horizon Forbidden West
Immortality
Outstanding Achievement in Sound Editing – Student Film (Verna Fields Award)
Ascent Brutal
Entertain Me
Key of See
Spring Roll Dream
This is Your Captain Speaking
Whiteboy
Through the Shattered Lens 